What Are We?

“Staying friends is safe, doesn't mean you should.” Ruin The Friendship

Ajabdeh almost felt sick to her stomach enough to skip her lunch as she sat down with her laptop, trying to distract herself. Bade Papa wanted her to write a speech for her first address to the employees next month. Her eyes kept wandering to the clock on the bottom right-hand of her screen as she calculated the time it would take for him to reach the venue. Her throat was dry, and no amount of water could do away with the tingling sensation she felt in her stomach. A knock on the door of her hotel room almost made her jump as she regained her composure and said a brisk “Come in.” Jalal peeped into the room, a little unsure as she narrowed her eyes slightly at him.

“I just came to check if… You are alright?” He asked, a little unsure, walking up to the bedside.

“Why won’t I be?” She retorted as he fell short of words. He cleared his throat and sat down on the edge of the bed. “Well, you didn’t have lunch, so… Aunty…”

“My mother sent you here?” Ajabdeh asked, raising her brows slightly. One thing she knew for sure about her orthodox mother was that she didn’t approve much of her relationship with Jalal, although she didn’t say it to her face.

“Well, no. She was worried and… so was I.” Ajabdeh shut her laptop and looked up at him, making him stop.

“You want to talk about the elephant in the room?” Her words surprised him as his eyebrows raised in a questioning tone, “Do you?” Ajabdeh sighed. She got down from the bed, stretching herself a bit, her oversized Kurtis flowing to her ankles, and then sat down on the edge of the bed beside Jalal.

He looked unsure. “What is going on in your mind?” Jalal looked up at her words as a faint smile appeared on her face.

 “I… What do we tell… err… him?” Ajabdeh exhaled as she slipped her hand into his fingers, entwined almost out of habit. “The truth.” 

“Which is?” Jalal wanted to confirm that they were on the same page, or rather the same story, to avoid confusion. Ajabdeh smiled faintly as she exclaimed, “My god, I have never seen you this scared ever!” She chuckled to ease the tension, but he kept staring at her. “Okay, we are seeing each other, that is not a crime, Jalal.” He looked up into her eyes for the first time in the last few days, now as she spoke. Her voice appeared monotonous, but Jalal knew her too well to understand the storm in her heart. Her smile faded at his stare. “We are seeing each other. That’s what this is,” he parroted her words, like he always did, with an understanding nod.

“Good!” Ajabdeh planted a peck on his cheek before getting up from her spot, “Now go and let me focus on my big speech for the employees.” Jalal smiled faintly, watching her bun her hair up in a mess.

“Yes, Boss.” he was about to leave when Ajabdeh held him back by his wrist, making him glance over his shoulder at her. 

“Did you manage to talk to Humayun Uncle?” Her voice was serious as he shook his head and looked unsure. Ajabdeh stepped forward, cupping his face in her hands as she made him look up at her. “Sooner or later, you have to face them; they will be disappointed, but this is your life. If you don’t want to join the business and pursue photography, tell him.” 

“I will… once Rukaiya’s issue is settled, I mean… they are already stressed,” Ajabdeh observed his excuses keenly and nodded in silence. She was in no position to be opinionated as far as his equations with his parents went. A part of the relationship they were in involved a certain amount of space and boundaries they didn’t overstep. She was aware of that. 

“You… work…” Jalal murmured before leaving.

Back in his room, Jalal felt a little empty. This was not something new. Ajabdeh always made the relationship sound lighter than it was. “Oh, we are dating each other.” “We are seeing each other.” Made it lighter than saying the word “relationship”, and a part of Jalal justified her by saying she was just commitment-phobic because she had been hurt once. But another part of him, the rational one, knew better. He knew she treated things just the way she believed them. Unlike him. He was old school in some ways. Like when they kissed for the first time, perhaps because they both wanted to know how it felt, Jalal was convinced that physical proximity would lead to something deeper between them, but he was wrong. A part of him sensed in some odd way that, unlike him, this was not the first time Ajabdeh was close with someone physically. She enjoyed the lust and separated it from the emotions, unlike him. He never dared to ask her the question that loomed in his mind: Who was he? Jalal went through his suitcase and found the welcome home gift he had brought for Pratap. One thing was for sure when Ajabdeh said what they were going to tell him, she very well meant it was he who would break the news. Jalal felt unsure of his reaction. It was right then that the commotion down the hall and a knock on his door made him step out of his room as Shakti walked past him, saying, “Come on, Bhaijaan, Dadabhai is here.” He gave one last glance at the closed door of Ajabdeh’s room before following Shakti.