Skip to main content

Change of Heart: Kabir's Journey

This Outtake from Protibimbo is written as a background story for Kabir, which was edited out of the original novel because I later thought it was unnecessary. You can read it after Chapter One, or for better understanding after the novel is over. Enjoy!

The day Kabir got off the train at Sealdah Station with his brother, he was intimidated by the crowd and pace of the city. Everyone seemed to be in a hurry. His brother was working as a daily wager in the streets of Calcutta for a decade almost and now that Kabir had passed his matriculation, his brother felt it was time for him to study in the city and earn his living. There was no better place to start a labour job than the streets of Sealdah. With that in mind, Kabir packed his very little belongings, greeted his Bhabhi, and kissed his nephew goodbye as he made his way to the big city. His brother was a member of the newly formed Labour Union and had already talked to his superiors about an odd job for Kabir. Learning that he was also going to be a student at the University of Calcutta the considerate man suggested that a waiter job at College Street would be convenient for his hours. So Kabir started working in the Indian Coffee House and managed to pay for his rented shared room as well as his fees with it. Initially, his brother used to come by once in a while to the Coffee House to check on him. The manager was a bald old man with an unfriendly face but knew of Kabir’s connection to the union to not mess with him. Kabir started going to college and soon found out that he was made fun of by the city boys coming in their father’s expensive cars or even by those whose fathers were teachers and bankers for Kabir looked Geyo. The more Kabir failed to make friends in college the more he was closer to the colleagues who worked with him. Life was like that for two years, with occasional visits back home on vacations, when one day his brother came to see him.
“I am joining the Congress.” His words made Kabir frown a little cluelessly. 
“You will still be working in the city, right?” He asked unsurely. The moment his brother lectured him about the nation needing young blood and him going away for some time, Kabir viewed him as an escapist. Someone who was running away from his responsibilities towards his family like a coward.

Kabir became more responsible towards his nephew and began sending home money after his brother was gone. The occasional letters that arrived from him let Kabir know two things, one, he was alive and two, he was constantly moving from one place to another. In the middle of the next summer, the Police came to the Indian Coffee House and sought out Kabir to ask some questions about his brother. It scared him to know that the police had even been to the village looking for him. The Manager felt Kabir was also involved in something illegal that would harm business and let him go.


Kabir was clueless for a while as to what he could do when his roommate suggested trying as a daily wager in the station area. For some weeks, Kabir was taking sacks of cargo to the railway yards and managing to earn enough for his fees. Most days he would eat less to save up but it left him with very little time to study. It was no shock to him when he failed to clear his honours finals and had to take the degree without it. On the day of the result, Kabir was taken to the Metia Bruz Baiji Bari by his roommate for some celebration. Although Kabir was unsure of it, he did not want to refuse. The glittering world of the lanes was a different universe to him. He somehow managed to befriend Mohini Bai, one of the young dancers whom he spotted in a corner reading a book. They talked about the book for a while and Mohini invited Kabir to come the next evening to watch her perform. Kabir was not someone who understood art. His hands were rough from odd jobs and any entertainment was a luxury for him. But something in Mohini Bai intrigued him. She was very young, almost a teen. He did not wish to say no. He thought it was going to be one day but then he met some interesting people at the Mehfil. Bonomali was about his age and was working in the La’at Saheb’s office. Hearing of Kabir’s plight he offered Kabir a job at his place. Kabir was more than happy to work for Bonomali’s family. They were a posh reputed family staying in the heart of the city and his job was to assist his old father with odd things. Reading the newspaper or writing a letter. Kabir however did not stop going to the lanes of Metia Bruz. Soon he was debating politics with Bonomali and a few others. He strongly believed that what his brother believed in was wrong. No amount of round table conference could bring freedom. Freedom was to be fought for. With blood, sweat and tears. Babus with their pleated Dhuti and Khaddar Panjabis could not bring freedom sitting in their luxurious living rooms. 


Bonomali seemed to disagree. The debate went on for long hours into the morning. Then Kabir was about to leave, to report to the job when Bonomali stopped him. He wanted Kabir to meet someone. “You are ready,” he said.

“Ready for what?” Kabir looked perplexed at Bonomali. That night Bonomali took him to one of the rooms in the back of the Kothi and introduced him to Upendra Gangopadhyay. Kabir was unsure and reluctant. Bonomali made him believe he would do the same odd jobs he did now, only with his eyes and ears open. There was no risk involved. Kabir agreed, more because they were paying him well and he needed the money now that his nephew went to school. Kabir did not know when he had started taking risks, eagerly, to gather more information and help the group. He had no idea what the group did with the information or how many people except Bonomali, Upendra or Sharat were involved. The group majorly worked on a need-to-know basis and Kabir did not mind. He did not want to get into trouble.


But one day changed everything for him. He was walking down College Street running some chores when he saw a protest group outside the Presidency College. He could read their placards and their demand for equal rights for Indians in comparison to British citizens in India. A police car came by, then two. There was a commotion among the protestors. Shots were fired. As everyone ran helter-skelter, Kabir noticed a bloody body on the road. He was one of the protestors. Was asking for someone’s basic rights worth being killed over? His blood boiled. He could not sleep for the next three nights and waited for his meeting with Upendra. When he finally met Master Moshai, he asked for riskier jobs. He wanted to drive the British hooligans out of the country for good.


Kabir was doing the same jobs with a different zeal now. He was extra risky but extra careful. Kabir thought often of his brother abandoning his family. A letter or two every few months was not worth it. That made Kabir decide he had chosen this life and he would not ruin another by marriage and vows he could not keep. He had no time to fall in love, no time to spend at home. Kabir’s plan was foolproof. He would see India in its independence day dawn and then find a job with the newly formed native government. He looked forward to it. But then Adhir and the others decided that they were doing the same thing they were against and it could not go on this way. Kabir was appointed at the house of the Magistrate as his cook. He had been training under the cook at Bonomali’s house for it in secret. He was ready for his job unaware that he was not alone in the mission. Meera was introduced to him by Sharat. It was not the first time she was working undercover but her first time in Barishal and her first time with a partner. At first, they were awkward and unsure. Playing with strangers was easy. But then Kabir slowly found a friend in Meera. In between their few assignments in disguise, Meera and Kabir discovered that despite their separate backgrounds and separate journeys they had both seen enough of the world not to be fooled by it. They both had no home to return to and a past they never discussed. The air of mystery in their friendship attracted Kabir. He had never had a friend in his life who was truly there for the sake of a friendship without ulterior motives. 


Meera was younger than him but wiser. He learnt much about life from her reactions and was grateful for it. But he was unsure whether someone like Meera would feel the same for him. Kabir was glad that their intel helped bomb the Magistrate successfully. But it meant that they had to stay under cover and not meet Meera for some time. That was when Kabir realised he missed Meera. At first, he assumed it was because of a habit he had developed but soon his wise heart realised it was more than that. He feared that his emotions would hinder his mission and ruin their friendship. He decided not to express himself to her in any way that would affect what they had built on a foundation of respect and trust. Little did Kabir know, that life had other plans.


ALL CHAPTERS




Comments

Popular Posts

See You Soon

Kunwar Partap entered the relatively quiet stable premises at the break of dawn checking on Bijli who was asleep, when he heard the sound of anklets near the cow shed. He walked up to the entrance of the stable, from where he could see her, her dupatta placed loosely over her wet hair, devoid of jewellery the way he never saw a royal lady, with a basket of flowers in one hand and a plate of sweets on the other. She was distributing sweets to the cow keepers, veterinarians and everyone who came by on the occasion of Lakshmi giving birth to her calf. “What will you name her, Hukum?” an old man asked. She smiled shyly, pressing her lips together. “Mandakini, Kakasa.” The old man smiled at her suggestion. “Like the kund? Very nice.” Kunwar Partap walked up to Lakshmi’s shed only after most people had dispersed to their work. Ajbante Kanwar heard footsteps behind her and turned with the plate that now had one sweetmeat left. Alarmed at his sight and at the lack of options she could offer fr...

Stable Boy

  “Jija, I want to go to the stables too.” Ajbante was stopped in the corridor of the inner palace by Ratan Kanwar, followed by their half-brother, Akhil who was three. “We do.” Ratan corrected herself. The dawn had just set on the horizon and the birds were chirping in the gardens. Ajbante Kanwar had just taken a bath in the private pool and managed to grab her empty flower basket to go to the gardens still before that, she would visit the stables and cowshed, check how Lakshmi was doing with her newborn, and if Bijli was okay with the sudden changes her father made. Ratan Kanwar’s nagging made her sigh and nod. “Don’t make so much noise so early in the morning.” She scolded them as they followed her, giggling and skipping down the hall behind her. “Don’t touch the newborn Kunwar Akhil, you will scare Lakshmi.” The familiar alarmed voice made Kunwar Partap stop gathering hay as he placed them down, wiped his forehead and glanced over his shoulder at the cowshed. There was some gig...

I Saw You

Kunwar Pratap was in his brown Dhoti, off-white angrakha and a piece of brown cloth tied to his head when he entered the palace premises. He was standing in the courtyard, eyeing the lofty towers and domes, wondering whom to talk to as some soldiers galloped their horses out of the stables on the right and some people were gathered on the left. The main entrance and two guards on either side and he decided to go towards the stairs leading up to the inner palace when the guards stopped him. “Who are you looking for?” “Rao ji?” He asked unsurely. “Rao Ramrakh…” “What audacity, boy?” The old guard scolded, “Say, Hukum!” “Yes, Hukum.” He nodded. “I came to tend to the stables.” “Then go to the stable, why are you loitering around the private gardens?” One of the soldiers said in a gruff voice. “He must be the one we were told about…” The other one reminded him. “Oh, go to the stables anyway, Hukum is busy practising, I will summon you once he is on the premises.” Pratap nodded at his words...

Towards You

Kunwar Pratap and Ajabde were friends. He didn't feel awkward sharing his plans and thoughts with her anymore. She was more than happy to advise him on everything. She was happy he listened to her advice before taking or discarding them, be it on what to wear to Padmavati's Sagai or how to befriend the revolting Bhils. He loved the way Ajabde always used metaphors from Puranas and Ramayanas to explain the toughest things so easily. She expressed herself so well, so easily that it amazed him.   The Afghans were now led by Mehmood Shah. They have made secret territories in the forests and waited to attack. Rawatji and his spies had confirmed the news and Udai Singh had warned Mehmood Shah to withdraw his troops from Mewar in vain. Now, it was time they declared war. Mehmood Shah had limited resources in Mewar. And his spies clearly suggested that in no way could he win, especially with Kunwar Pratap leading his troops. He was having second thoughts about the war. One of his aides...

Queen of the Heart

Kunwar Pratap was in the Dangal Sthal practising his moves. Ajabde decided it was fair to know his strength before the big competition. Sword in hand, in a white female warrior attire with only her face visible she hid behind one of the large watchtowers of the Dangal watching him move. She heard Rawatji say, " Your left hand is still weaker than the right one with the moves. Both should be perfect." A smile curved her lips. Knowing an opponent's weakness always helps, which is one rule of the war she always remembered.   Kunwar Pratap swung his sword with his left hand and turned around. He could sense someone watching, his sixth sense was never wrong. He looked around and hatched a plan. Ajabde again peeped at the grounds to see it was empty. He had left. She walked towards the empty ground, sword in hand. Suddenly, the cold blade of a sword was felt on her neck. She stopped still. " So someone was spying on me." His voice had a hint of taunt. " No, I was...

Prologue: Impulsive Hearts

1576 CE. The dark clouds circled over the Haveli of the Chieftain at Avadgadh, one of the unimportant posts on the western borders of Mewar, Rajputana. It was the arrival of the rainy season, with occasional downpours over the green veil of the Aravallis on the horizon and the streams that often meandered around the hills now surged like rivers. The monotonous life in the little settlement was stirred by the arrival of guests in the Haveli. It was not usual for the old chieftain to receive so many guests, especially women and it sparked curiosity and rumours among the villagers. Who were these people? Some of them looked like royal ladies and some not. In the inner palace of Avadgadh, on a balustrade that was designed with Jali, nymphs adorning its pillars that looked over the Aravallis in a distance, covered with dark clouds, the gusty wind blew the new curtains almost toppling a vase kept by the window. She caught it, alarmed, almost out of the force of habit to be alert about her su...

Unexpected

" This is your room Ranisa." Hansa opened the door to the well-furnished large guest room of the Bijolia Palace. The diyas were lit and the room was neat and clean. " Your Daasis decorate the rooms well." Jaivanta Bai looked around. " Oh, Ranisa. all these... " Hansa smiled proudly. " All these are done by my daughter." " Your daughter?" Jaivanta Bai smiled surprised. " Milwayiye ." Jaivanta Bai was eager to meet her. " Ajabde! Ratan!" Hansa called as the girls came in. 13-year-old Ajabde preferred a simple lehenga in a pink and blue Dupatta clad over her head. She was the first one to calmly bend down and touch Maharani's feet as a five-year-old Ratan came running. " Ajabde is very talented in sewing, gardening and home decor. She can also...." " Maa Sa...." Ajabde's soft protest stopped Hansa as Jaivanta Bai smiled. " Accha, I won't tell but these are your good talents, right? ...

Protectors

Rao Surtan was at the Palace gates as the soldiers tried in vain to attack with arrows. His army was stronger and more competent than the one Balwant headed at the Bijolia Fort Gates. “Break the door” he ordered. “Where is Ajabde?” Hansa looked around the cellar. “Jija!” Ratan exclaimed. “She was on the roof last I saw.” “Ajabde.” Hansa Bai opened the cellar door and stepped out followed by Ratan who was equally worried. “Stay back!” Sajja Bai called in vain as Jaivanta Bai too walked out and up the stairs to the corridors of the Ranimahal in search of Ajabde.  Meanwhile, Surtan’s army had entered the palace and he made his way to the Ranimahal. He was having different thoughts now. Killing Jaivanta Bai won't yield him anything… Maybe capturing a few young maidens… Ratan froze in the corridor seeing the man approach. Behind her were her mother and Jaivanta Bai with the same reaction. “ Jee Bavro ho gayo!” Surtan Singh took out his sword. Ratan took two ste...

Life and You

" Maharanisa! Maharanisa!" The Daasi ran through the quiet Rani Mahal as Jaivanta Bai who was sitting in front of the Lord in her room ever since she was back, rushed out of her room followed by Sajjabai and Veerbai. " What happened?" She asked, her voice calm, but her heart thumping. " Kunwarsa is here... with Kunwarani... She... She...." The Daasi sobbed as Jaivanta Bai rushed to the room. She stood at the door as her eyes couldn't believe what she saw. Kunwar Pratap was soaked in her blood as he laid her down on the bed shouting " Jaldi. Rajvaidya..." His eyes stopped at the door as Jaivanta Bai rushed to be beside the unconscious Ajabde. The Daasis and Sevaks were running about soon enough. SajjaBai gasped at the scene. So much blood. Kunwar Pratap hadn't noticed anything except her calm unconscious face. Now he looked down at his blood-soaked hands, red, he stared at them as though in a trance. " Kunwar Pratap! Tell me what happ...

You Deserve More

Ajabde woke up with the song of birds as she felt something warm clinging to her hand. Her eyes went wide. Her hand was on the pillow in between, between his hands, clasped as he slept. She thought of removing it slowly but he was holding it so tight. Ajabde's heart beat faster and faster. What do I do now? How do I not wake him? What if... why is my hand in his? She was utterly confused.   " Am I..." In love? Pratap was staring at the sleeping figure on his bed as he again looked back at the rain. Then he looked back frowning as she shivered. He closed the windows of the room, to make it cosy then sat on his side of the bed. A lamp flickered on her side like always and he stared at her sleeping figure as he put his blanket over her as well. She shifted a little in her sleep to make herself cosy again. Her payals and bangles made a rhythmic sound breaking the silence of the room. Her hand was out of her blanket and on the pillow in between. He tried to slowly put it in th...