Aniruddha eyed Trilochon, sitting at the desk in his room, attending to some paperwork. His reading glasses were on his nose, and he appeared engrossed in a financial document. He stood at the threshold, a bit unsure and glanced over his shoulder at Somnath, Batuk and Bondita. She gestured at him to go on. Aniruddha cleared his throat. That prompted Trilochon to look away from his document at his nephew.
“Jethu, if you are busy, I can come back…” He suggested unsurely.
“Come in and close the door.” Trilochon glanced over Aniruddha’s shoulder at the others who walked away hurriedly. Aniruddha closed the door, and Bondita tiptoed to place her ears on it. Batuk and Somnath stood at a distance.
“So you met her?” Trilochon spoke while cleaning his glasses. Aniruddha nodded. Somnath had introduced them to Ashalata. Bondita, Batuk, and he had met them in a Dhaba off the highway. Although Bondita did most of the talking, initiating a friendly gesture to put the nervous Ashalata at ease, he had observed her confidence in Bondita’s queries. She seemed well-bred and educated. He conveyed the same opinion to Trilochon.
“Well, we can go talk to her father…” Trilochon said nonchalantly. “I informed Binoy, and he told me to do the needful.” Aniruddha frowned at his words.
“Baba will not come home for that?” He looked a little shocked.
“He said he wants nothing to do with your personal lives, especially when it's your own choices.” Aniruddha was about to open his mouth to protest when Trilochon got up and patted his shoulder, “Don’t worry, I will convince him to come for the wedding. All of you are so stubborn.” He sighed. Aniruddha stood silently, adjusting his glasses over his nose.
“That day, Biswas Moshai was talking about a girl in her thirties…” Aniruddha looked up at his words and shook his head. “Not again, please.”
“Why not?” Trilochon scolded. “What do you want?”
“To be left alone.” Aniruddha shrugged. Trilochon inhaled.
“You know how difficult it is to stay alone?” He rebuked. Aniruddha smiled faintly.
“I don’t believe one can be happy if they don’t find like-minded people to be around. You have seen how Baba and Ma never had a single agreement. I have not found someone…”
“Nobody will be built in the same mould as you. That is impossible.” Trilochon shook his head. “Hence, adjustment and compromise are needed.”
“Why will I compromise when I am perfectly fine alone?” Aniruddha raised his brows. Trilochon inhaled.
“I can’t debate with you. You will realise your loneliness when you are older.” Aniruddha could sense worry in his voice.
“I won’t be alone. I have everyone here.” He shrugged.
“And what about after Somnath has a family? Batuk stays away now…who will care for you? I won’t be here. Bondita will be married…” Aniruddha looked nonchalant at his words.
“I can take care of myself. And I can spend my time pampering my nephews and nieces, I know someone who did that.” Trilochon stiffened at his words, making Aniruddha frown slightly as he looked away, gesturing at him to leave. “You will not even realise when you become something you never wanted.” He murmured.
Aniruddha unlocked the door to hear the sound of anklets retreating. He looked a little alarmed at Trilochon, who was back to his work and did not seem to have heard it. He opened the door and stepped outside. Bondita was summoned to the study room with the order to make coffee. She walked in, the dupatta of her salwar kameez tied on the side, and placed the coffee down as he stared at the computer through his glasses.
“Now we can relax and enjoy a wedding.” She smiled. Aniruddha did not respond. He did not lift his eyes from the screen either. She was about to leave when she stopped to spot her certificate and class graduation photo on the wall. She smiled a little longingly at the wall. It was full of certificates from the Roy Chowdhury brothers' academic achievements, and her picture seemed to fit in seamlessly. She remembered Thamma’s repeated reminders. They are not family. We are indebted to them. But could Bondita ever explain that in her twenty-five years of life, they were the closest she had to one? She glanced over her shoulder at Aniruddha, who was busy typing away on the keyboard with knitted brows. The page on the screen reflected in his spectacles. She inhaled as she gathered her thoughts and pushed away the sudden feeling of overwhelming gratefulness she had for him. Perhaps Thamma was right, for if she did consider them family, she would not have felt grateful like she did.
“Will I have to make coffee for you at the office, too?” She asked, trying to sound lighthearted and cheerful. Aniruddha removed his glasses and inhaled as he looked up in her direction. He could see her frizzy hair that was braided, the sweat on her forehead because she was in the kitchen perhaps, the look of eagerness in her kohl-drawn eyes as she was trying to ask about his conversation with Jyatha Moshai or whether Binoy would come soon. He knew Somnath could never ask him, so he must have sent her.
“Do you have any idea about what I had to go through today?” He looked displeased as Bondita’s smile faded. “All this because you dragged me as a mediator into Som’s issue.” Bondita opened her mouth to protest. He stopped her by pointing a finger at her.
“No, Jethu was over the topic of marriage before all this started. Now…” He inhaled. “You owe me for my peace of mind.” Bondita had a hundred questions running through her head, but she could see he was irked, so she nodded silently.
“Thank you. And sorry for your troubles. If I knew…” Her words made him narrow his brows. “I will repay all the debts I possibly can.” Her words made him glare at her with knitted brows.
“Ever since you're back, you seem to have learnt to be formal.” He rebuked. “Go home.”
Bondita left quietly without sparing another word of protest. It bothered Aniruddha. The Bondita he knew would argue, tell him his responsibilities as a brother were to talk to elders on their behalf and demand things to be done. He was not used to this new side of a wiser woman. He hated how she sounded grateful to him, but he knew he could not force her to feel otherwise. Aniruddha sank back in the chair, lost in thought; perhaps it would go away when she worked at his firm. He was sure Thamma had to do with this belief in her. But could he intervene and address the matter, or let it be?
Durga Puja at the Roy Chowdhury house had lost a lot of its past glory and charm in the years Bondita had been away. The guests, kin and friends came from all over India to attend the Pujo. They were fewer now that most of the cousins were married, had children in schools across the country or were abroad. Trilochon wanted Bondita to be involved in the preparations for the Pujo. He repeatedly told Kalindi that for the first time in years, he was glad that all the children were home, and he lamented about Binoy’s absence because he refused to come. His excuse was that he could not leave the business twice for Pujo and the wedding. Bondita also received a saree from Jyatha Moshai, which she kept neatly away to wear on Ashtami. With her savings for the first time, she had brought a saree for Kalindi and a Panjabi for Trilochon from Kolkata, much to their surprise. It pleased her more when she saw that they chose to wear it on Saptami. Trilochon proudly told anyone who complimented him that it was a gift from her. The kin and friends who had come for Durga Pujo were all impressed with Bondita. They had not seen her in a while. Her success was applauded by many who knew her journey. Along with that, in hushed tones, they praised Trilochon for being kind to an orphan. She was aware of that, too.
Aniruddha eyed the new clothes that Trilochon had urged him to wear for Saptami. He could hear the ululation from the courtyard early at dawn for the Kolabou Snan as he yawned lazily, inspecting the new Dhuti Panjabi he was supposed to wear. It was a tradition in the Roy Chowdhury house for the men to dress traditionally during Durga Pujo. Although Aniruddha felt quite comfortable in the Panjabi, he was yet to break into a habit of wearing Dhuti as easily as Jethu did. He had to get Bihari’s help to wear it properly and often felt slight discomfort moving around in it. But he knew that if he came downstairs in a simple Pyjama Panjabi or jeans Panjabi, it would make Jethu grumble for the rest of the week. He walked into the washroom and eyed his reflection in the oval mirror on the wall. He looked a little sleep deprived, and his stubble made him look sick. Just as he thought that, and his eyes fell on the razor, he remembered once when about a decade ago he had tried keeping a stubble, and Jethu kept saying he looked sick.
Som was critical that it grew unevenly. Batuk had not quite grown an opinion on beards. But Bondita? She walked into the study room with Mini, asking for Saraswati Pujo donations for the neighbourhood club, eyed his stubble and laughed. He was annoyed at her laughter as Mini looked amused. She had said he looked like the madman who sat under the banyan tree near the church and murmured to himself. That made Mini suppress her laugh as she watched him get annoyed.
“Why do you want to look like that when you look so good, clean-shaven?” Bondita’s words made him stare at her and Mini, who agreed with her with a horrified look. Bondita, for the first time, looked a little embarrassed by what she said. Mini, on the other hand, was trying to save her from a scolding. But Aniruddha was amused enough to roll his eyes at her as Bondita and Mini shared a laugh. Aniruddha smiled at the memories as he brushed his hand over the stubble and picked up the razor.
“Look at that, you don’t look sick anymore. I have told you so many times…” Trilochon spoke approvingly as Aniruddha walked down the side stairways, holding the edge of his Dhuti. Bondita, who was in the Thakur Dalan helping with separating the flowers, Bel Patra and Tulsi looked up at Trilochon’s words. Aniruddha was surrounded by some cousins by then, who were taking his blessings, letting him know of their career choices and life updates, as Bondita found herself staring. He looked younger, more like the man she remembered, if only he ditched the glasses. Bondita’s heart raced as she forced herself to look away, but her eyes travelled back to him. He nodded at someone’s words, his eyes wandered and fell on her as she looked away. He excused himself and walked up to the Thakur Dalan.
“Do you need help?” She looked up at him, standing on the uppermost stair of the Thakur Dalan as she smiled and shook her head.
“Why did you not dress up?” He asked, narrowing his brows a little, eyeing her Kurti as she smiled faintly.
“I … can’t work in a saree…” She said sheepishly. “Thamma said I will learn if I try.”
“I can’t even sit in this thing.” He admitted. “But to make Jethu happy…”
“You look quite handsome today, Dadabhai. Doesn’t he?” Batuk interrupted, folding the sleeves of his Panjabi as he eyed Bondita. Bondita did not nod even when she noticed his eyes travel to her for approval. Instead, she smiled, amused at Batuk and asked, “Is the Panjabi a size smaller than you?”
“No, he is a size bigger this year.” Aniruddha rubbed his hand playfully on Batuk’s belly as he smiled sheepishly, and Bondita let out a chuckle.
“Maa, we will start now. Call everyone.” The assistant priest interrupted as Bondita got up in a hurry. She walked down the stairs and eyed the courtyard to see who else was missing as she hurriedly put on her shoes. Aniruddha followed her down the corridor, looking for Som, as she stopped at the staircase and shouted, “Dada! Daadaaa!” Aniruddha put his finger in his ears in jest as she eyed him, and he said, “Jethu is so pleased I shaved.” Bondita nodded. “You do look… younger…” She shrugged. “Is that a bad thing?” He asked unsurely. She smiled, amused. “I guess not.”
“Then it's gone for good.” He shrugged. “Jethu is happy.”
She forced herself to look away as he tried to decipher her expression. “Uff, Som Dada, where are you?” She ran up the stairs, leaving him standing there.
She did not have time to interact much with Aniruddha, Batuk or Somnath after that day, as they also seemed busy playing host. Occasionally, she would be asked to make coffee, which Koeli took to him. He did not come down for the Ashtami Anjali or any other ritual, and Bondita remembered that Batuk had told her he had stopped doing everything their mother did. A part of Bondita understood that. After her parents, she too had stopped doing a lot of things she loved. She was glad nobody had forced him. But when she wanted to check on him, ask whether he was fine, a part of her realised she could not walk into his room or ask the questions she wanted to as easily as ten-year-old Bondita could. There was an unsaid barrier in their friendship as she had come of age, and she could not deny that.
On Navami, Trilochon summoned her to the living room early in the morning. She checked the watch, but there was a little more time left for the preparation of the Puja. She hurried to the house in a pair of jeans and a Kurti, unsurely.
In the living room, an old man was sitting in Pyjama-Panjabi, chatting with Trilochon, and a woman sat beside him in a gaudy saree, jewellery, and shyly refusing the sweets Koeli offered.
“There she is… This is Bondita. She is my daughter.” Trilochon introduced Bondita, who smiled politely at the guests. “Bondita, go tell Aniruddha they are here.” He eyed Bondita suggestively. Bondita realised that this was the woman Trilochon was talking about for Aniruddha. She thought he had dropped the idea after the last conversation. Her throat felt dry. He was displeased with her on the matter; how could she ask him to come down to see a potential wife material? She was reluctantly leaving when Aniruddha came down the stairs in jeans and a polo-necked black t-shirt. Bondita had not seen him in casual clothes for a long time; he was always in his formal or traditional clothes. She tried hard to suppress her will to stare, brushing away the admission in her head that he looked handsome. Aniruddha was putting on the watch like he was about to leave, and he first spotted Bondita standing in the middle of the hallway, frozen to her spot and then his eyes fell on the others. Narrowing his brows, he approached the guests.
“Ah, there he is, Aniruddha.” Trilochon stood up as Aniruddha eyed the guests, who folded their hands. Bondita stepped back, unsurely, as Aniruddha greeted them with “Nomoskar.” She knew should go home, but leaving abruptly would be rude. “This is Meghna.” Aniruddha glared at Trilochon, aware of his intentions.
“I am going to Kolkata and will be back by evening.” He said, ignoring the introduction.
“What?” Trilochon did not hide his displeasure. “I told you not to work during Pujo.”
“What can I say? I have no work-life balance.” He shrugged suggestively. The guests exchanged glances. “I work all day and have no time for anything else.” Bondita’s eyes widened at his sarcastic tone as she eyed the guests and an awkward Trilochon.
“But… you…” Trilochon eyed the guests with an awkward smile. “Can go after some time…”
“When have you seen me idling around? Besides, I also have to visit a village that is without electricity for a month.”
“What village?” Trilochon knew when he asked the question that he had set foot in Aniruddha’s trap.
“That remote one in Jangalmahal, where Maoists attack all the time. It will be good if someone comes along with me…” He eyed Meghna very charmingly with a smile. “I am looking for someone who would help me with the issues concerning the Adivasis.” Meghna made a judgmental face involuntarily at her father, who looked worried. Trilochon inhaled.
“You are not going to do this again,” he warned Aniruddha.
“What am I doing?” he shrugged. “I am just letting them know about my lifestyle. Surely they appreciate a good Samaritan?” The guests looked puzzled at his question.
“Oh, don’t look worried. I will go see that therapist Salim suggested once Pujo is over.” Bondita stiffened at his words as he smiled. “My workaholism needs help. You were right, Jethu. I will also need some money from you because you know… “ He turned to the guests with half a smile, “I work voluntarily and don’t get paid often. Anyway, let’s catch up later. See you soon.” He turned to leave, and the guests stood up. He walked past Bondita, waving at her as she could not react. The smile of amusement on his face reflected in his eyes. Bondita heard Trilochon murmur something as the man said, “Now we see why he is unmarried and almost forty.”
Bondita turned and ran to the porch where his car was parked. She reached just in time to stop him from opening the driver-side door as Aniruddha looked up at her.
“What was that?” Bondita almost snapped. “You insulted the guests. And Jyatha Moshai.”
“When?” he narrowed his brows. “I just twisted some facts for them to know they can do better.” His words surprised Bondita. “Better?” She asked.
“Than an almost forty single workaholic good Samaritan? Absolutely,” he shrugged with a smile. He was about to open the door when she stopped him again, placing her hand on the handle.
“You are not going to work during pujo.” She had a sternness in her voice. Aniruddha looked up at her with a faint smile. He remembered that stern voice. When someone would fall sick in the house, she would tell them to eat in that tone.
“I am going to a Senior’s house for an invite.” He reassured her. “It's not work, I lied.”
“Now you lie also?” Bondita shook her head, disappointed.
“When I need to get out of situations…” He shrugged. “White lies are fine; now, let me go.”
“You are running away, aren’t you?” Bondita’s question made him skip a heartbeat. He looked up at her and looked away.
“Bondita…”
“You know what I feel… I feel you think you are not going to be a good partner.” Bondita had no idea what made her say what she was thinking, but she continued as he froze and stared at her. When did she happen to know what a good partner was? She was a child a while ago.
“You have seen your father remain aloof; you have seen Jyatha Moshai being alone all his life. You think you are like them. You won’t be sensitive enough to be…” Bondita looked at him, smiling as she stopped with a frown. “You feel you are emotionally unavailable and comfortable not feeling vulnerable?”
“You can be a journalist with such stories.” He shrugged off the uncomfortable vulnerability that hit him with her words. How could she see through him? “Let me go, I am getting late.”
“Fine, run away.” Bondita was about to slide away from the door as he grabbed the handle of the car to open the door when the trinket on her bangle was tugged back by the steel band of his watch. It was oddly stuck in between the design of the steel plating, forcing her to inch closer to him in her attempt to set herself free. For a moment, Aniruddha was amused again.
“This serves you right for trying to overanalyse me.” He chuckled as she glared at him and looked puzzled at the stuck trinket. He raised his hand to her eyesight, waiting as she tried to undo the trinket with narrowed brows. Aniruddha suddenly observed that she wore eyeliner and lipstick, something he did not remember her doing. Bondita could suddenly smell his perfume and aftershave. He smelled fresh. He had not changed them in years. She hated that she remembered that.
Footsteps alarmed Bondita about the proximity as she tried to move a little away from him, between his body and the car, and her hand pulled her back. The guests coming down the stairs eyed them suspiciously as they walked towards the main road. Bondita watched them go, feeling awkward with how they saw her, as Aniruddha used her flabbergasted time to remove the trinket from his watchband, in the process breaking it. Bondita gasped. “You broke my bracelet.”
“I will get you another one.” He shrugged. “At least I am free from you.” Bondita did not respond. She moved away as he got into the driver's seat, put on his sunglasses and waved at her and left. Bondita stood in the empty portico with the trinket in hand, cursing herself for speaking to him that way with her assumptions. Maybe he did not like the outsider intrusion. Maybe she was wrong.
Dashami at the Roy Chowdhury house was a grand event. The procession that took Ma Durga to the Ghat used to be full of grandeur, with chandeliers, Dhakis, dance and Dhunuchi. Local people came for the Sindoor Khela and took part in the immersion of the idol. Many onlookers gathered outside the house and along the Strand to watch. It was also the day Bondita decided to wear the new saree. She was too busy on Ashtami to dress up and went with the comfort of a Patiala set, so it was her chance. While Bondita was wearing Alta on her feet with Koeli’s help, Kalindi surprised her by taking out some of her jewellery and telling her to wear them.
“These are gold.” She sounded alarmed. Kalindi smiled. “Yes, they are from my wedding.” Bondita looked surprised, and Kalindi smiled into her reflection in the mirror, “Let me dress you up; see how you look.”
Bondita wanted to resist the idea but could not. She remembered that as a child, she would have to patiently wait for her turn after her cousins for Kalindi to help her with the saree. Today, she wore the blue saree in Atpoure style on her own, neatly, without any help. Kalindi helped her put on the Jhumka, choker, ball chain and bangles. She chose a small red bindi for Bondita and tied her hair into a bun, and placed a red rose on the side.
“See how beautiful you look.” Kalindi bit off the tip of a nail from Bondita’s little finger and murmured, “Nojor na lage.” Bondita stared at her reflection in the mirror as she heard Kalindi say, “You look like a new bride.” Her cheeks grew warm as she brushed the feeling aside and stared at the clock. She was late for the preparations. She hurriedly put on some lip gloss and ran to the house.
She was at the threshold when she spotted Bihari taking in plates from the courtyard.
“Have you arranged for the Sindur and Boron Dala?” She asked as Koeli nodded, “Come check them once, Didimoni.” Koeli smiled, “You look very pretty.” Bondita smiled at the validation.
She rushed inside, taking some of the empty flower baskets from the doorway and made her way to the courtyard. There was an odd hour left till people started gathering for the Boron. “Oma, you look beautiful, Ma. Time to get you married.” Trilochon smiled, blessing her. “Uff, Jyatha Moshai.” She shrugged embarrassedly, “Where should I put these?”
“Put them in the storeroom as of now,” Trilochon called out to her as she turned left to reach the storeroom door. Bondita was contemplating how she could open the door with both hands holding baskets when Aniruddha came around the corner, adjusting his Dhuti Panjabi and spotted her.
“Here.” He rushed to open the door for her as she was about to murmur thanks, but stopped, carefully remembering his words. He smiled inwardly as she placed the baskets down, and he stood there holding the door for her. Most of his view was obstructed by the baskets in her hand before she placed them down, and when she turned, Aniruddha could see she was dressed up. The look on his face made her inhale.
“I know, I am overly dressed. Thamma did it.” She said, anticipating some sarcastic taunt. He nodded silently. “No, you look…” He did not finish the sentence as she rushed to the courtyard, calling out to Bihari. Aniruddha followed, finding a place by the pillar, leaning on it idly, watching her instruct everyone around. Batuk was busy arranging the Dhunuchi for the dance in the procession while Trilochon sat down by the stairs of the Thakur Dalan, observantly. Bondita took the Ghot from the priest, and amidst ululation and conch shells, she put it in Trilochon’s hand as he touched it to his forehead and then instructed her to give it to Som for immersion.
The guests started pouring in, the courtyard was filled with married women playing sindoor, when Bondita, with her cheeks smeared with sindoor, started searching for Trilochon Babu to declare that it was time to start the journey to the Ghat. She found Aniruddha in the crowd. Aniruddha was busy talking to old Mitra Moshai from the neighbourhood about reforms needed in the legal system when he noticed a tug at his Panjabi from behind and turned to spot Bondita. He was a little flabbergasted as he noticed the vermilion on her cheek, which oddly reminded him of his mother, as she had to raise her voice above the merriment and Dhak to inform him to find Jethu. He nodded silently at her and walked indoors. Koeli informed her they needed more Sindoor, and she would fetch that. It had been about five minutes when Bondita went looking for them upstairs.
“You embarrassed me.” Trilochon held the end of his cane agitatedly. Aniruddha tightened his jaws.
“Then you should have just listened to me. I am an adult who can…”
“This is still my house!” Trilochon roared. “Whatever I say happens.”
“You have no right to dictate others' lives at your will.” Aniruddha shook his head. “Especially when you have not married…”
“Dictate? When did you ever listen? I worry for you…”
“You don’t have to worry about me.” Aniruddha raised his voice, irked, “Why does everyone think they know me?”
“Because we are family, we care for each other.” Trilochon would not back down.
“And caring does not mean being stubborn enough to think you can rule my life. It is my life, and I… am just fed up with your mindset.” Aniruddha inhaled.
“If staying in your house means I have to do what you say, I can…” He turned to leave as Trilochon looked alarmed, raising his hand to stop him. Aniruddha turned to find Bondita standing at the threshold, looking shocked at their argument. The moment he saw her, he inhaled, trying to pacify his anger and looked away as she walked in.
“Ki hocche ta ki!” She scolded as both men looked away. “People can hear you from the heavens! What is this…” She eyed Aniruddha as he fumbled, “Wh… what? Me? He started…” She walked past him to Trilochon. “Could this not wait till everyone left? Everyone is waiting for you.” Trilochon nodded at her sternness silently. Somewhere, this motherly scolding was always the reason for a truce between them when she was half her age, too. She eyed Aniruddha and shook her head disappointedly.
“Come down to the courtyard now, both of you!”
“I am not going…” Aniruddha glared at her as Bondita’s jaws tightened.
“There you go, and I am stubborn!” Trilochon walked past them out of the room, murmuring. “Ja Iccha koruk.”
“It is not an option.” Bondita shook her head firmly. “It is a family tradition that the eldest must…”
“Don’t teach me my family traditions!” Aniruddha interrupted angrily, “Can’t you just leave?” The moment he said that, Aniruddha was scared. She had left the last time he uttered those words. He always thought that if he had not argued with her about boarding school before he left for Delhi, she would have waited for him to return. He would have taken her to the boarding school himself.
Bondita was about to say something when Koeli interrupted, a little scared. “Didimoni, where should I keep the plate?” They looked up at her, standing near the door with a plate of vermilion that Bondita instructed her to pour.
“On my head.” Aniruddha walked off, irked. Bondita shook her head. She turned to say something to him. Koeli tried to move away as his arm flung carelessly at the plate, and the vermilion fell on the floor. The plate made a noise, making Bondita gasp as she ran to Koeli, who froze.
“Bring something to clean this with.” She instructed while looking around at the mess.
“Look what you have done!” She looked up at Aniruddha with a disappointed glare. “Ki raag re babah!” He stormed off to his room.
A knock resonated on his door after a few minutes.
“Leave me alone, Bondita.” He shook his head.
“I will not leave until you come along.” She sounded firm. “If that means I miss my first Bhashan after so many years, so be it.” Her jewellery made a sound as he could see her silhouette move under the door. “I am sitting by your door. If there is anything I learnt from this house, it is to be stubborn.”
“You were stubborn before you came here.” He sounded irked.
“That I was.” She knocked again, “Are you coming or not?”
Aniruddha opened the door to find her sitting on the floor, facing the door. She stood up in a hurry, with a suppressed winning smile as he exhaled. “Come along, we will fight with Jyatha Moshai later. I will take your side. I promise.” She reassured him and ran down the corridor.
“I am not a child, Bondita.” He murmured as he noticed that she had perhaps stepped on the toppled vermilion, and the entire white marble of the corridor floor now had her foot imprints.
“What have you done?” Aniruddha turned at Thamma’s voice in the courtyard after he heard the sound of something falling. Bondita had toppled over a plate of freshly mixed Alta, and her hand and feet were drenched in it. She looked a little shocked but was quick to recover as she asked, “Who put it there?” Thamma pulled her ear, making her scream. Trilochon walked out in a hurry. “Kalindi, don’t beat the girl. It's Durga Pujo.” Thamma eyed her as she ran to Jyatha Moshai in tears.
“I will scold her.” He reassured her by patting her head. “Now go get dressed, Maa.”
“No, you will not scold my Thamma.” Bondita shook her head, making Kalindi share an amused glance with Aniruddha. “Then I will scold you.”
“Bondita!” Kalindi raised her voice again, prompting her to run inside the house, the imprint of her alta-split feet making its way up the stairs.
“Dekho Kando.” Thamma rebuked. Trilochon tried to pacify her as Aniruddha walked up the stairs to find her under the desk in his room. He sat down on the floor as she wiped her tears.
“Come along. I will tell them not to scold you.” He said, extending his handkerchief to her. “You need to clean up.” The eleven-year-old shook her head.
“No, I will not go to Pujo. Everyone scolds me.” She puffed her cheeks in anger.
“I don’t.” Aniruddha frowned. “Do I?”
“But you shout at people. It scares me.” Aniruddha inhaled. “Fine, I will not shout at anyone. If I do, you can shout at me.”
“I will get scolded again.” Bondita frowned.
“No, you are allowed to scold friends; nobody will scold you,” he reassured. “Come along.” He took her hand, which was red with the spilt Alta and started rubbing it off with his handkerchief. She sniffed.
“Will you take my side and say it's not my fault?” She questioned. He smiled.
“Of course, we will fight with Thamma and Jethu together, alright? But after the rituals.” He promised.
Aniruddha walked downstairs to find the idols being loaded on the trucks for the procession. He eyed Trilochon sitting in a corner, moving his hands in a gesture to tell Kalindi what happened. She looked worried. He inhaled and turned away to see his brothers preparing for the Dhunuchi Nach. Bondita walked between Batuk and Somnath and snatched a Dhunuchi from Batuk’s hand. She followed Somnath’s movement and laughed because she did it wrong. A smile formed on Aniruddha’s lips as he approached them. She had inhaled some smoke from the camphor and was now coughing. Batuk took the Dhunuchi from her hand and handed it to Aniruddha.
“Dadabhai does it best.” He declared. The people had by then formed a circle around the middle of the courtyard, giving them the space to move with the Dhunuchi. Bondita stepped back, watching the brothers. Aniruddha moved in between his brothers with the Dhunuchi and looked up at Bondita, whose smile faded briefly at his stare. He nodded as if to say Should I? She smiled with a nod. Go on.
When Aniruddha turned with the Dhunuchi, he saw Som urging Bondita to join. She looked reluctant because she did not want to make a fool of herself. He stopped and took the Dhunuchi from Som’s hand and pushed it into Bondita’s hand. He moved slowly as she imitated him, smiling at his gesture that she was doing it right. The sound of Dhak, conch shells and ululation filled the air. The idols were then loaded onto the trucks as Bihari informed them.
“Batuk, go on the one with Ganesh; people will be confused about who is who!” Som made Bondita laugh as Batuk sulked, prompting Aniruddha to glare at Som to stop.
“Let Jethu go with the Ma Durga idol, people will be gathered on the streets to see them both.” Aniruddha made them nod. People were already loading onto the trucks, and Som pushed Batuk onto the truck Ganesh shared with Kartik. Some of his friends were also there. Bondita had rushed to Kalindi to tell her that she was going with them. She pushed through the crowd towards the truck, looking for familiar faces, and spotted Trilochon on the bigger truck. She looked around again and heard Aniruddha call out.
“Come on.” He gave his hand as she took it and pulled her up on the smaller truck shared by Ma Saraswati and Ma Lokkhi, which was occupied by a lot of kids from the neighbourhood. They had nowhere to sit, so she stood by him as he balanced himself on the edge of the truck.
As the trucks started moving and the crowd was waving and dancing, Bondita smiled at the enthusiastic kids and the people, the light and grandeur she remembered and missed. Aniruddha eyed her with a faint smile and murmured, “Look what you missed all these years.” Bondita turned to look at him as if she had heard something. The dhaak was loud. “Did you say something?” She leaned in to listen. Aniruddha shook his head, careful enough that her sindoor-smeared cheek did not touch his white Panjabi. “I thought you said something.” Bondita noticed him moving away and straightened herself, thinking he was awkward. He pointed at her cheek as though he could read her mind. “There is sindoor on your cheek.” She tried to brush it away as he gave her his handkerchief. She took it and tried in vain, turning his handkerchief red as she stuck out her tongue, alarmed.
“Ebaba. This is ruined.”
“No worries.” He shook his head as she stared ahead and laughed.
“Look at Batuk, Som Dada was right, give him a mask and he will be a fine Ganesh.” She stopped laughing when she noticed him staring, amused, as she wiped her teary eyes.
“What?” She frowned as her heart skipped a beat.
“Nothing.” He looked away. “Who would say we were fighting a while ago?” She raised her brows.
“I was not fighting, I was debating.” She shook her head. Aniruddha chuckled, amused.
“You still don’t call fights as fights?” Bondita bit her lower lip and looked away. “But you should puff your face like you used to; I will at least know you are angry.”
Bondita remembered the first time she had not puffed her cheek in anger when she was thirteen, and he had fed the first piece of cake he cut to Batuk instead of her, despite her opening her mouth. She was stomping around the study, refusing to talk, and he had no idea she was angry with him. She had to say it out loud, and he was amused and laughed, reminding her that he did not notice because she did not puff her cheeks in anger. When she said she was not a child anymore, he laughed some more. Bondita stared at him, smiling, and realised he still saw that little girl in her, no matter how much she had grown.
“You were right, I should not have crossed the line into analysing you.” He narrowed his eyes at her words.
“Is that an apology again?” He asked. Bondita was quiet. “Bondita, you know very well my problem is not with you. But he…” Aniruddha glanced at Trilochon getting down at the Ghat “he doesn’t seem to get it.”
“Do you get him?” Bondita asked, making him think, “What do you mean?”
“I mean, he must have his reasons and experiences, too. We never know.” She shrugged as the helpers opened the truck latch and the kids started jumping out. Bondita was unsure of jumping in a saree. Aniruddha read her mind.
“Let me go first,” he insisted and got down from the truck.
“Now sit down, and I will pull you down.” Bondita was not comfortable with this idea as he patted the floor of the truck.
“I can do it myself, " she insisted as she sat down, feet dangling, and jumped down, losing her balance as he grabbed her.
“See what happens when you don’t listen to me.” He held her shoulder firmly as she balanced herself before he walked off to join his brothers. Bondita straightened her saree and joined Trilochon at the Ghat.
As Ma Durga was put in the waters of the Ganges, the crowd echoed, “Bolo Dugga Mai ki Jai, Asche Bochor Abar Hobe.” Bondita was overcome with a sudden bout of sadness. The men were sharing hugs and wishing Subho Bijoya as she watched them touch Trilochon’s feet. She proceeded to do the same and wished, “Subho Bijoya.” Then, she searched for Aniruddha in the crowd. She glanced over her shoulder to find him touching Trilochon’s feet as he blessed him with no hugs or words exchanged. She sighed as she approached him.
Aniruddha was surprised as she touched his feet.
“It could wait…” he murmured. Bondita smiled. “Subho Bijoya.”
“May you flourish and all your dreams come true.” He blessed her.
Bondita stepped into the courtyard after removing her jewellery and handing them safely back to Kalindi. She had opened the hair from the bun, and it hung at her waist as she stood at the empty Thakur Dalan with one single lamp being lit in the middle of the empty Chalchitra. This always made her sad. Bondita was occupied with the thought when Koyeli interrupted her, asking about where she should keep certain things for the next year. Trilochon had instructed her to deal with it. Bondita inspected the brassware and Puja Utensils before Bihari put them in a trunk. She sat down on the stairs of the Thakur Dalan, her open-air pushed over her left shoulder as she wrote down which thing was placed in which trunk before being put away in the store room.
Aniruddha was in his room to change from the Dhuti Panjabi when he noticed a hint of redness in his fingers. That of Alta that Bondita had put on her fingertips, which might have transferred to him when he held her hand. He walked out to the balcony and spotted her in the empty dark courtyard helping Bihari. He suddenly remembered how his mother used to list everything for the next year after the pujas were over. Bondita had a hint of tiredness in her now cleaned face, the Kajal smudged below her eyes, and the saree wrinkled. Aniruddha remembered the first time she was not home, he was sure she would come back for Pujo. He would scold her for leaving without telling him. Then she did not come. He waited for the next year with a new question. He would ask her why she did not want to return. He straightened himself as she walked away indoors, leaving the courtyard empty. He needed to ask her that.
Comments
Post a Comment