Light of a Torch

 Tujhme Roshan Hoga Suraj

Toh Dhoop bhi Aayegi

Shabdh Kagaz par challenge,

Toh Raah tu paegi.

"And then you know, Didi, he just jumped in and started shouting. Everyone got intimidated, including Kakababu." Sampoorna's eyes widened at Bondita's words. She was moving her hands dramatically as she spoke. "Pin drop silence. He's feared like a demon, I swear, when he starts shouting. Nobody uttered a word. " Bondita's eyes widened. "Even I got a little scared. He's like a Rakkhosh." She giggled. "Rakkhosh Babu!"

"Bondita!" Sampoorna warned her, "He's helping you. And you are calling him Rakkhosh?" Bondita pressed her lips as her eyes sparkled with a mischievous smile. "If anything, he's been a protector of the school. A Rakshak." Bondita suppressed her smile and nodded. 

"I am grateful to him. Not that I am not." She agreed. "But he's so strict and grumpy."

"Choto Malkin." Koeli came looking for her "Boro Malik is asking you to meet him in his room."

"Now?" Bondita frowned. Koeli nodded. 

"I'd better get home too. My mother-in-law will scold me." Sampoorna looked alarmed. Bondita nodded. 

Bondita knocked on the half-closed door of Kaka Babu's room. She peeped in to find him on the rocking chair, Aniruddha on his writing desk, and a few papers lying across the table.

"Did you ask for me?" She asked, approaching the table. Trilochan looked up. "Yes, I did." He nodded. "Sit down."

She did as she was told, taking the empty couch beside the rocking chair. 

"Sign here." Trilochan gave her a paper. 

"What is this?" She frowned. 

"Read it yourself." He smiled. Bondita took the paper in her hand and looked at it. It was a will. To give her his crop fields when the properties will pass onto the next generation. 

"Why are you giving me your fields, Kaka? You want me to be a farmer?" Her question was met with laughter from Trilochan. 

"Bondita. I thought about what you said at the Panchayat yesterday." He spoke. "About how women have no properties or homes. So I talked to Aniruddha, and I want to officially write to you a part of my…"

"No." He stopped at her words. Aniruddha looked up from the desk. "You have done enough for me. I can never repay you. I am not part of your family. I can't take this." Aniruddha admired her selflessness. The crop fields cost a fortune. She put her self-respect above them. It was rare. 

"Don't teach me. Just sign it." Trilochan looked irked.

"Kaka." She looked at him with a smile. "I just said that to win a bigger battle. No woman would need this if they just let her have equal opportunities like men. To study. To have a job. To earn her living."

"What?" Trilochan looked wide-eyed. "We just discussed studies. What about jobs?" He looked alarmed. "You are not going to work and earn. By Ma Dugga's grace, Roy Chowdhury Zamindari has enough." Bondita looked puzzled at him.

"She can work if she wants," Aniruddha spoke up, making Bondita look up at him. "It's her wish. But for that, she needs to study hard and get a degree."

"A degree?" Trilochan looked at his nephew. "Women don't go to college here."

"They do so in Calcutta. Bondita too can. If she wants." He seemed adamant. "There is nothing wrong with it."

"What about… what about homeschooling?" Trilochan looked perplexed.

"It's not enough to get a job." He shrugged. "If she wants to work…"

"Enough. We won't discuss this any further; no women in the Roy Chowdhury house have ever worked outside. They don't need to." Trilochan stood up. "You may leave. Both of you."

"Jetha Moshai," Aniruddha spoke up. "Many women study nowadays. They teach. They work. It's very normal for them." He met Trilochan's cold stare.

"It may be normal for you, Bilaeti babu, but not in my house." Trilochan shook his head, holding on to his cane firmly.

"It is normal everywhere, Jetha Moshai. Open your eyes and see for yourself. Don't close your heart to new things."

"I have told you what I intended to do." Aniruddha's jaws tightened at his words. 

"Well then, so have I. If Bondita wants to study, she will study. I will make sure she does." Aniruddha got up and left in anger.

Bondita looked shocked at the turn of events. She got up quietly, glancing at Trilochan once before heading out. 

"Now what new drama is this!" Trilochan spoke in a tone of rebuke. "Wasn't the panchayat enough?"

Bondita found Aniruddha standing on the open balcony overlooking the lawn. He turned his head at the sound of her nupur as she stopped at the threshold, unsure. She then turned to leave. 

"Do you want to say something?" His words made her stop. She turned to face him. He still looked angry. Bondita knew the Roy Chowdhury blood. Once they were angry, they got stubborn, and no logic worked on them. 

"I… think you were rude to Kakababu." She looked unsure as he frowned at her words.

"What?" He looked agitated. "Now you think I am wrong?" He shook his head. "You saw how he thinks and…"

"Barrister Babu." She seemed calm. "Maybe this makes very little sense, but see their generation. For his generation, Kakababu has progressed. He has come a long way from allowing homeschooling to realising the importance of education and helping us set up the women's school. He is worried about society. And rightfully so. But look at him trying his best to welcome the new. You can't be angry at someone who genuinely cares for you over their ideas that reflect our society." She inhaled and looked up at his face to see if he was listening. Aniruddha had his eyes fixed on her as he concentrated on her words. So Bondita found it best to continue.

"Every generation progresses a little from the previous one. You can't expect him to jump into the idea of women working after knowing he comes from a place where women didn't even touch books. Right?" Her face looked intelligent. 

"You have travelled half the world and seen things. These people think Tulsipur is their world. We should be calm with them. The anger won't get us anything. Especially with our own people. You need them by your side when you fight the world. Not standing against you." He nodded at her words. "Your battle is not with them."

She looked a little conscious. "I am not saying your anger wasn't justified. It probably was. But you also painted a big picture in front of him. It intimidated him."

"How do you think so clearly at this age?" She stopped at his words and looked up with a hopeful smile. "I agree. I may have overreacted."

"Then apologise to him."

"What?" He asked, a little surprised. "Bondita I…"

"My Maa used to say, always apologise when you are wrong. It doesn't make you smaller." Aniruddha sighed.

Trilochan looked up as Bondita entered the room. He turned his head away, seeing Aniruddha behind her. 

"Tell him to leave," Trilochan said. 

Bondita hid her smile and gestured at Aniruddha.

"Jetha Moshai… I…"

"No. You are always right. We have become old without any experience." He rebuked.

"I apologise," Aniruddha said. "Genuinely."

Trilochan was still looking away. Puzzled, Aniruddha glanced at Bondita. Apologies were not his thing. Bondita hid her smile again, gesturing at him to hold his ears. Aniruddha looked wide-eyed and shook his head. Bondita nodded. This time, she gestured to hold both his ears. Aniruddha sighed.

"I am sorry, Jetha Moshai." He held both his ears and knelt down in front of Trilochan, who looked shocked. "I won't get up unless you accept my apologies."

"It's okay." Trilochan watched him from the corner of his eye and looked away. Aniruddha remained seated. Trilochan stared at him, holding his ears, and then at an amused Bondita.

"Did you tell him to do this?" He asked.

Bondita shook her head. "Me?" She shrugged. "Does anyone in this house ever listen to me?" Trilochan saw her make a sad face.

"Enough now." He placed his hand on Aniruddha's shoulder "Both of you." Aniruddha smiled as he surprised Trilochan with a hug, making him smile too. Bondita tiptoed away, happily.

It was late afternoon when Aniruddha sat with the newspaper in the Baithak Khana. He was alone at home. He was almost feeling like taking an afternoon siesta when he heard Batuk's agitated call. 

"Dada. Dada." He shouted. "We need help."

"What happened, Batuk?" He asked, alarmed, walking out towards his brother. "It's Bondita. She is stuck in the fire in the storehouse." 

He ran across the grounds with Batuk behind him and stopped at the sight of the fire engulfing the storehouse. The girls were standing in shock. The boys who were Batuk's friends were busy bringing buckets of water to douse the flames. Debaditya stood agitated and kept shouting.

"Bondita?" He shouted at the open door of the room, "Can you hear me? Come out now. I order you."

"What happened?" Aniruddha looked scared. "Is she stuck inside?"

"No, she went inside to save the books." One of the girls cried. The books?

Aniruddha gathered all the courage he could find to tie a handkerchief on his nose and go through the flames and reach out to Bondita in the smoke.

"What do you think you are doing?" He managed to cough a little. " You will get hurt."

"Just save these books." She spoke, handing him a few. When Aniruddh walked out of the smoke and fire in a haze, dropping the books on the ground and untying his handkerchief to breathe, he turned his head to see Bondita make her way out. Then his vision blurred.

"Are you mad?" He heard voices echoing. "He could have died."

Aniruddha woke up to the sudden splashes of water on his face. The first face he saw was Batuk followed by Bondita's. He realised his head was on her lap as he tried to get up. His head spun. 

"Water?" Sampoorna offered him a small clay bowl of water. 

"Don't tell at home." He murmured. Batuk exchanged a look with Bondita.

"She is mad. In trying to save the books, she put both your and her own life at risk." Batuk retorted.

"Are you alright?" He had half turned to see Bondita's grim face. She nodded. "I am fine. Let's go home." He stood up holding Batuk's hand and his balance was unsteady. He found her hand firmly on his arm as he looked up at the building in ashes.

"How did this happen?" He asked. 

"Someone burnt it down," Debaditya said. "We found empty oil cans."

"But why would they do that?" He asked, surprised.

"Well, after Bondita's little stunt at the Panchayat rallying the women, it is certain to assume she made a few enemies who don't want her to teach the girls," Debaditya spoke, concerned. "It is a genuine reason for worry. Moreover, this plot was meant to be the school. Now we have to rethink the safety concern."

"They are just trying to scare us." Aniruddha spoke reassuring them "We just need to find a safer place."

"You could have died." The words came very monotonously yet firmly from his side. He looked at her. "Anyone could have." He stated.

"But not trying to jump into the fire because of me." Bondita looked away. Her eyes shone. Aniruddha fell silent and walked away with Batuk.

When they arrived back home, Binoy was waiting for them in the hallway. 

"Aniruddha. I wanted to talk to you about something. " He spoke as Bondita and Batuk left. "I have organised a party in your honour this Dol Yatra weekend. I hope you will attend it. All my business associates will come. There will be a Jalsa."

"Baba, you know I am not into all that." Aniruddha tried to smile politely.

"You are the heir to this zamindari, Aniruddha." Binoy patted his back. "Adopt some zamindari ways. I promise you will enjoy it." He let out a laugh. "You look very stressed ever since you came back. Trust me. This is not a father speaking, but a friend." Binoy smiled. Aniruddha forced a smile and left for the study.

"I heard there was a fire at the storehouse." Trilochan's words made Bondita's hand stop at serving him as her eyes met Aniruddha's across the table. 

"Yes." She said calmly. "I think the villagers…" Trilochan pushed away his plate. "I had warned you. Consider yourself lucky that nobody got hurt." 

"Yes." Bondita agreed, looking away. Trilochan looked up at her surprised. She didn't argue. She didn't try to prove herself right.

"Are you alright?" He asked, concerned. Bondita nodded in silence. "I don't feel so well." She walked away from the dining hall. 

Binoy and Trilochan exchanged a concerned look. 

"Baba. Kaka. I have an idea." Aniruddha made everyone stare at him.

Bondita was on the roof of the house, on the swing that was placed amidst the rows of potted flowering plants. She gently pushed the swing with her bare feet. Her hair was undone, and her jewellery was removed. She breathed in and closed her eyes. Whatever the villagers had said was partially correct. She had a voice because Trilochan allowed it. In the end, the cycle of patriarchy could never be broken. She was as much in it as everyone else, perhaps more. She was forever indebted to Roy Chowdhury. Yet today she felt extremely scared, unsure and guilty. If anything had happened to Aniruddha Babu because of her school and her stubbornness, not only would she never have been forgiven, but she would have also lost a family she called her own. 

Footsteps made her sit up, alert and adjust the saree over her chest. She looked up at the staircase to find Aniruddha in his white nightwear at the threshold. Their eyes met briefly as she forced a smile.

"I was going to leave." She got up in a hurry, tying her hair up in a bun. 

"No. Stay. I needed to talk to you actually." He said, sitting down on the swing and gesturing for her to sit too. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, you?" He nodded. He couldn't help but notice her bun had again become undone and fallen loosely over her shoulder. 

"So I was having this conversation with Jetha Moshai and… " Bondita looked up at him.

"I am genuinely guilty of whatever happened today." He looked up at her face, her eyes shining. "I didn't know I would put your life at risk and…" she held her ears. "I apologise."

"That's over now. But your life is still at risk. So I was thinking…" he smiled, "why not make the school a safer place...like inside the premises of the Zamindar Bari." Bondita looked surprised. 

"And he agreed." Aniruddha smiled at her. "You can start tomorrow. I have already informed Debaditya about it."

Bondita looked up at him. All this while she was fighting alone. In this house. In the village. She didn't feel it was her lone battle anymore. He was becoming a torchbearer for her purpose. Bondita felt grateful.

The next morning, when Aniruddha reached the lawn for his yoga session, he smiled seeing the girls flock around Bondita and Devaditya in the distance. They were cleaning up the spare rooms Kaka had allotted them for the school. They brought in boxes and paint, stationery and books. The girls giggled and talked. Devaditya introduced them to a new teacher. Ghosh Babu was older, and he had once taught Devaditya too. He was happy to help. It was decided that the older girls would take the younger classes, and the teachers would take classes for the older girls and the few women who wanted to study. Bondita decided to teach the children and women herself.

Aniruddha had just finished his asaan and sat down on the lawn bench, wiping his sweat off with a towel, when he saw a bunch of children approach him with Bondita in tow.

He looked up as the smallest child held out a drawing for him.

"We wanted to give you this for helping us." The children said. He smiled at the painting of a stick figure of a man whom he assumed to be himself, surrounded by stick figures of smaller children. He looked at the bright young faces.

"Thank you." His words made the children look confused as he looked up at Bondita, cluelessly.

"Dhonnobad." He was quick to correct himself at her stare. The children smiled. 

"Umm… Barrister Babu." He looked up again as Bondita approached him. 

"Yes, Bondita?"

"Can you teach me Engrazi?" She asked with a hopeful smile. "So that I can teach the girls?"

"You want to learn English?" He asked, a little surprised but happy. She nodded.

"If I have to go to college I need to. Right?" She asked. He agreed.

"Very well, but you need to adjust to my odd timings. I can't promise you classes, at the same time every day."

"Agreed. I will. When do we start?" She asked. He gave it a thought. 

"First thing tomorrow?" He asked. Bondita's face lit up.

"Dhonnobad." She said, almost clapping her hands in excitement. "I will go tell Batuk."

"Wait." Aniruddha stopped her. "Why not surprise everyone by reading and writing it instead?" He suggested. 

"That's a better idea." She smiled.

"Yes. Until then let's keep the classes a secret." He suggested. She nodded in agreement and left to join the others in the schoolroom. Aniruddha watched her go.

Words:

Rakkhosh: Demons in Hindu/ Bengali myths and folklore

Rakshak: Saviour or protector Ashaan: Yoga posture