Skip to main content

Lost Love

 Navroz Mela, 1608, Rankatta, Agra.

The Nawroz Festivities and fair were arranged in the village of Rankatta near Agra for the year. A few days before the festivals, tents were set up for the royal family, and chieftains also made their way to the village with their wives and daughters. The last to arrive at the occasion was the emperor himself who had stopped on the way, at the tomb of his father, posthumously honoured “Arsh Ashyani”. He however managed to reach it on the dawn of the festivities.

Padshah Jahangir adjusted his turquoise gem-studded turban and stared at his reflection in the mirror, while his attendants helped him with the muslin robe. Did he look anything close to the late emperor whom everyone idolised? Did he look convincing enough to himself? He sighed, careful enough not to let the stress show on his face. Ever since he had his senses, Salim felt this way. The pressure of being an heir apparent, added to the constant rebuke and doubt by his own people, and when his father doubted his ability to lead the Timurid throne, he rebelled in frustration. It was not easy to fit into the expectations of ruling like Emperor Akbar. He had always looked up to his father’s skill of diplomacy. He sipped on his cup of wine, trying to gulp in the bitter taste of expectations with it.

“The Shehzaada is here.” The guard announced with a bow as he nodded with a smile. He felt the need to be close to Khurram sometimes, something he had not been able to do with Khusrau, and something his own father never did. This day, was their first official father-son moment. His first chance at making Khurram feel at home in Agra. The boy had lived most of his days in Lahore near his grandparents, and Jahangir doubted if he held grudges against his own father.

Jahangir kept down the cup of wine, half-finished, on the tray and dismissed the attendants as Khurram entered the room and bowed. His red turban, gold and green robe, and glittering smile were not to be missed.

“Today is your official appearance at the Navroz Khurram Baba.” Jahangir turned to face his son who nodded slightly. “On this auspicious occasion, I would like to have you on the weighing scale.” Khurram looked up at his father surprised. Traditionally, it would be the emperor who was weighed on a scale, with clothes, jewellery and things, to be distributed to the poor later in the day.

“But Padshah... why me?” Khurram asked not hiding his surprise.

“Can I not let my son take my place once? It is your first Navroz here.”

“Gratitude Padshah...” He had bowed, as was the rule, but Khurram was surprised by a sudden hug from his father. Jahangir patted his back slightly and gestured at the door.

The Navroz fair was organised in the open-air Bazaar meant for the ladies. Colourful stalls were set up by the ladies of the harem, as well as families of eminent chieftains of court. Some Rajputs sold Bandhni veils and turbans while some Persian stalls had handmade carpets. Asmat Begum set up the perfumes she had made especially to sell at the fair, up in coloured fancy bottles for the ladies to try while Arjumand and Ladli sat patiently behind her. As excited as Arjumand was for the new dress she was happier to see Ladli.

Mehr Un Nissa hurried with her stall. She put up some nice dress material samples on display and took out her drawing books to draw up order designs from the ladies. Her light yellow dress complimented her glowing skin, and her surma-clad eyes shone from expecting the first customer. She exchanged a glance with her mother and smiled satisfied at how her stall appeared.

The courtroom cheered as the emperor made his way to the Dais of public appearance with Shehzaade Khurram in toe, and Asaf Khan leading the way to the weighing scales. Ulemas and Pandits stood witness as the riches in jewellery, weapons and clothes were brought in from the treasury, waiting to be weighed. On the window of appearances, behind the purdah, stood the Begums. As Salima Begum and Rukaiya Begum made their way to witness the events, Jahangir gave his nod. Asaf Khan bowed, holding out his hand for the emperor to step up on the weighing scale, and Jahangir pushed Khurram ahead. The scholars exchanged puzzled glances and so did the courtiers.

“Pardon me my Lord; it is neither the Shehzaada’s solar nor lunar weighing nor his win in any war. The Navroz tradition...”

“I want Khurram Baba to be weighed. For many of his solar or lunar weightings, I have not been present, and from this day, I hope he has many wins. I declare sending Shehzaade Khurram on his first expedition soon.”

The crowd cheered as Khurram looked up at the window. There stood Jagat Gossain, her eyes sparkling proud but his eyes travelled to his Shah Ammi’s smile, which lit up her eyes. She was proud of him. As Jagat Gossain found his eyes wandering from hers to the lady, her heart sank. Sahila Banu stole a glance at her and smiled at the happenings of the day.

Khurram was weighed, and the wealth was distributed to the poor and needy. He then sat beside his father’s throne for the special day’s events unfolding at the court. The ladies made their way out to the Bazaar.

Sahila Banu with her ladies was followed at a quick pace by Jagat Gossain who showed her around the Bazaar, introducing her to some of the ladies again. Her eyes stopped as Asmat Begum bowed.

“Why, you are here to Asmat Begum!” Jagat Gossain smiled ”I thought the mothers of Ladies in waiting are not allowed to have stalls here.”

“You know right my lady, but my husband and son are still courtiers of the emperor.” Asmat Begum smiled bowing, now at Sahila Banu. “Padshah Banu, can I have the pleasure to mesmerize you with some perfumes?”

“Why not?” Sahila Banu smiled, dismissing Jagat Gossain’s stare. “I love mild ones.”

“Perhaps Lavender then?” Asmat Begum offered a scent of the purple liquid that made Sahila Banu smile.

“Perhaps some Jasmine for you, my lady?” Jagat Gossain stared at the girl who offered her the scent. She was about Khurram’s age.

“Who are you?” Jagat Gossain asked rubbing the scent on her wrist slightly. “her helper?”

“I am Mirza Asaf Khan’s daughter, my lady.” She bowed. Jagat Gossain nodded, taking the perfume and ordering her lady in waiting to pay the girl.

“Aren’t you the one studying with the princesses now a day?” Sahila Banu asked softly.

“Yes, my lady” Arjumand smiled “The Sultana Sahiba has been too kind.” Jagat Gossain’s smile faded a little as she looked at the girl again. Her brows narrowed slightly as she asked “Have you met Shehzaade Khurram, my son?” Arjumand was taken aback by the question, more so because she thought Rukaiya Begum was his mother.

“I...” Jagat Gossain didn’t wait for her to respond as she stared back at the eunuch who followed her. He replied in an affirmative nod as Jagat Gossain left in a hurry.

Arjumand stood awestruck at her behaviour as Ladli tucked at her skirt. She picked the child up on her lap as she saw Sahila Banu make her way to her aunt’s stall.

“Come, Ladli let's go see the fair.”

Mehr Un Nissa was taking orders from one of the ladies for a pearl-studded veil when she was pushed away to make room for Padshah Banu. Mehr looked up from her sketch and hurried with a bow.

“So, I heard you impressed Sultana Begum with a dress.” Sahila Banu smiled.

“She is too kind.” Mehr Un Nissa smiled.

“Show me a unique piece you can make for me.” Sahila Banu scanned her dress material as Mehr Un Nissa hurried with her designs.

“I heard of your husband.” Sahila Banu spoke as she checked one sample out.” Sad that the emperor ordered him...” She stopped as if she had said something she shouldn’t have and saw Mehr Un Nissa’s jaws clench slightly. “His... trail... for betrayal... before he... passed away...”

Mehr was quiet. Sahila choose a fabric and slid it towards her. “I want it in a week.”

“Sure Padshah Banu.” Mehr bowed as she left.

“It’s time for you to visit the fair.” Asaf Khan informed the emperor while Khurram’s eyes lit up.

“Seems like the Shehzaade wants to visit the fair soon.” Jahangir laughed slightly “Come on Baba. Let’s go see what the ladies are selling.”

Jahangir would lie to himself if he said that the thought of seeing Mehr never crossed his mind. He was aware that she was here, aware that Rukaiya Begum took her under her wings, yet there was a boundary he couldn’t cross to reach out to her. A boundary that Salim should have crossed years ago, but the emperor couldn’t for the newly widowed mother. A part of his heart hoped she was there, that he would see her face after a decade, and things would go back to as they were when they met for the first time. The other part of him never wanted to see her face, feel the pain, which ached his heart once, and perhaps see sadness or anger in her eyes. He could never take a disappointed look from Mehr. His thoughts trailed as the Nagada announced his arrival.

The Nagada made Khurram’s heart leap as he caught a glimpse of Arjumand, with Ladli in her arms, trying out some bangles at a stall. His heart wanted to leave his father’s side and rush to her, talk to her, and know what she was up to. But he looked away, taking small dignified steps behind his father.

Arjumand smiled at Khurram’s sight taking a step towards him in the crowd but stopped as he looked away, waving to some people in courtesy, his turban shining and his aura that of royalty. Her smile faded as her heart skipped a beat. She didn’t know why, Khurram looking away, made her sad. He was the prince after all, and unlike their afternoon poetry sessions, he had an image to uphold, here, on royal duty. She saw him disappear into the crowd after his father.

Mehr Un Nissa looked up from her customers, at the sound of Nagada and her face turned a little pale. There he was a few feet away, his twirling moustache like his father’s, his pace that of an emperor and his eyes inspecting the crowd. Mehr Un Nissa had prepared in her head for this moment. Yet, she wasn’t ready. Her throat dried up, as her heart leapt. She felt guilty, about the way he still made her feel. She felt guilty about how she felt towards him, after everything that happened; she cursed herself for forgetting at that moment that she was Ali Quli’s widow, not his lover anymore.

The crowd in front of him dispersed as he could see Asmat Begum’s perfume stall now. His eyes wandered to her left and stopped, locked in another pair of eyes staring back at him. A shiver ran down his spine as he gulped. He wanted to look away but couldn’t, she wanted to stare away but couldn’t. A few more pairs of eyes witnessed this and exchanged glances as Mehr Un Nisa slowly turned pale. Something churned in her stomach as she felt her knees go weak. She hoped he would look away. Jahangir clenched his jaws and fisted his hand over his sword to clear the blur of his vision. He looked away forcefully and sighed.

“Why, you are here!” A familiar voice made him feel relieved.

“Badi Ammi.” He turned and greeted Rukaiya with a smile “I just brought Khurram here...”

“Khurram, why don’t you introduce your father to your new friend?” Jahangir frowned a little clueless at her words as Khurram was taken aback.

“Shah Ammi?”

“Where is she?” Rukaiya Begum looked around.

“I will go... get her.” Khurram rushed through the crowd as Jahangir stood with a questioning look and Rukaiya smiled.

“I think before you send your son to war, you must see his choice of a bride.”

“A Bride?” Jahangir was a little taken aback. In his head, Khurram was still the child, running about in the gardens of Lahore, as Badi Ammi smiled at him.

Arjumand gasped at the sudden pull on her wrist in the crowd as Khurram stood in front of her with a smile. Her cheeks flushed warmly as he let go of her hand, and she looked away.

“I was looking for you.” Khurram smiled. “How are you, Ladli?”

“Why?” Arjumand frowned. “You just ignored me a while ago.”

“Ignored you?” Khurram frowned. “I... just followed my... he wants to meet you.”

“Who?” Arjumand looked scared.

“My father, the Padshah.” Khurram smiled “Shah Ammi told me to take you there.”

“But... why me?” Arjumand thought she had lost her voice scared.

“Because you are...” Khurram stopped and stared at her scared face “A friend.” He held her by the wrist and pulled him a little to follow him through the crowd.

Rukaiya Begum’s smile faded a little to see Arjumand, with Ladli in her arms. But she maintained her calm as the girl bowed to Jahangir.

“She is the daughter of Mirza Asaf Khan.” Rukaiya Begum spoke rather plainly.

“Is this your sister?” Jahangir asked acknowledging the girl.

“She is my aunt’s daughter.” Arjumand looked scared as the Emperor stared at her cousin.

“Of course she is.” He sighed. She had her mother’s eyes.

Jahangir left the crowd towards the Khas Mahal as Rukaiya followed him.

Mehr Un Nissa was quick to rush to Arjumand’s side to collect Ladli, a little scared and overprotective.

“Phuphi, meet Shehzaade Khurram.” Arjumand spoke as Mehr Un Nissa bowed. He wouldn’t perhaps remember the times when he was small, and she often met him in the gardens while waiting to catch a glimpse of his father. She hoped he didn’t know who she was. Khurram’s smile made it evident that he didn’t.

“You have a lovely daughter my Lady.” He spoke, “Can I have the pleasure of her company at times when Arjumand and I recite poetry in the afternoons?”

“It will be her honour Shehzaade.” Mehr Un Nissa forced a smile as she held Ladli close. What if Emperor Jahangir was a threat to her child as much as he was to her late husband? For the first time, the thought of losing Ladli crossed her mind and scared her.

The very famous Navroz festival fair was where Jahangir had met Mehr Un Nissa and most probably Khurram met Arjumand. For the sake of the story, Khurram and Arjumand are friends, which was also very much possible since no clear historical account of how they met is available. Mehr Un Nisa’s newest designs became a trend in the Mughal court and the talk of noble ladies not only when she designed clothes herself but even when she became empress. Her style of angrakha, hats and jewellery was copied by ladies of the Timurid clan often even in later years.


READ STORY HERE

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Protisruti

  প্রতিশ্রুতি  বন্দিতা মা কে জড়িয়ে ধরে যেন প্রাণ ফিরে পায়।  “ভাল আছিস?” জিগেস করে সুমতি। বন্দিতা হঠাৎ খেয়াল করে আগের মতো তার মুখ দেখেই তার মা আর তার মনের অবস্থা বুঝতে পারেন না। তার সাথে হঠাৎ মনে পরে কত অনায়াসে অনিরুদ্ধ বোঝে যে তার মন খারাপ। একবার জিজ্ঞেস করেছিল সে স্বামীকে, কি করে তিনি বোঝেন তার মন খারাপ। ছোট বন্দিতাকে তার মতন করে বুঝিয়েছিলেন তার স্বামী। আজ বন্দিতা বড় হয়েছে কিন্তু সেই প্রশ্ন সে আর করতে পারেনা। বন্দিতাকে খাটিয়ার উপর বসিয়ে এর মধ্যেই সুমতি যায় তার জন্য মুড়ি মুড়কি আনতে। বন্দিতার চোখ পরে পায়ের নূপুরের উপর। তিনি বলেছিলেন “তুমি খুশি হলে তোমার নূপুরের আওয়াজ অন্যরকম হয়, আর তোমার মন খারাপ হলে অন্যরকম।” বন্দিতা নূপুরটা বাজিয়ে দেখেছিল সেদিন। আজকে সে জানে পার্থক্য তার নূপুরের শব্দে নয়, অনিরুদ্ধের পর্যবেক্ষণ শক্তিতে। আবার কেন তার কথা ভাবছে সে? বাড়ি এসেছে মায়ের কাছে। আর ভাববে না সে, হয়তো দু তিন দিন পর ত্রিলোচনবাবু পাঠাবেন বিহারী কে বন্দিতাকে বাড়ি নিয়ে যেতে, ততদিন মায়ের কাছে একটু শান্তিতে থাকুক না সে।  দুপুরে আম দুধ দিয়ে ভাত দেয় তাকে সুমতি। “তোর প্রিয় খাবার দেখ, মাম...

Answers

Aniruddha could not work all day. It started raining heavily outside, the curtains of the room swayed in the gusty wind, and things around the room toppled over. Koeli came to pick them up, to see if he wanted to eat anything but Aniruddha wanted to be left alone. Countless questions and fears raced through his mind. Bondita never went home like she did that day. Rather, once a year, even before Jamai Sasti, she checked the household chores a hundred times. If Batuk had a test, if someone was sick, she was reluctant to go. She just packed a bundle so quickly and left for her mother’s place. Had she distanced herself from Aniruddha? Was it his fault? Anirudha started thinking. Could she not take him as a husband because he pushed her away and hurt her? Aniruddha repented for his actions. If indeed Bondita denied their relationship knowing the truth behind it, could she be blamed? But was that why she was pretending to be asleep even though she was awake that night? What did she think ab...

Promises

Bondita hugged her mother as if to find herself again.  "Are you okay?" Sumati smiled. Bondita suddenly noticed that her mother couldn't understand her state of mind just by looking at her face anymore. With that, she suddenly remembered how easily Aniruddha understood that she was upset. Once she asked her husband how he understood things without her saying it. Her husband explained to little Bondita in a way she would understand. Now that Bondita was grown up she could perhaps never ask him that question again. Meanwhile, Sumati hurried to get her some Muri Murki while she sat down on the bed. Bondita's eyes fell on her feet. He had said, "When you are happy, your anklet sounds different, and when you are sad, it is different." Bondita stirred her anklets unmindfully. Today she knew the difference was not in the sound of her Nupur but in Aniruddha's powers of observation. Why was she thinking about him? She came home to her mother. And she would not th...

Choices

The winter rains and gusty wind were unpleasant weather for Adhiraja Ishaan Dev. The Suryapalian capital was far more tropical weather of the plain lands than that of Neelambargarh, situated on a plateau rather close to the Heemdevi. It rained more in Neelambargarh, and the winters were cold. The wine did very little to comfort him as he kept the lamps of his chamber lit in an attempt to feel warmer. On the contrary, he observed how Priyambada complained that the winter isn't cold enough. It had been a quarter of the moon cycle since Maharani Priyambada met Kumari Advika of Mait. Although Ishaan Dev was eager to know what the ladies did talk about, he wasn’t sure whether to ask Priyambada. So he waited for her to tell him something, anything! But Priyambada seemed to act like the meeting never happened. She didn’t even disclose anything to Smriti as per Kumar Viraj. Ishaan Dev was perplexed. What was talked of in the meeting? Worse, did Advika mention him? She must have. The last t...

Going Home

Bondita's Mama came to Tulsipur to meet his daughter. He was a poor man and wore a short dhoti and a Batik shirt. It was wrong to come empty-handed to the daughter's house, so two pots of sweets accompanied him. Reluctantly, he had to go to Roy Chowdhury's house. They were the Zamindar of Tulsipur, the master of the father-in-law of Sampoorna, they needed to be respected. Apart from that, the fate of the sister and niece who he was reluctant to shelter and spent day and night rebuking them about had turned, the same sister now handed over some money to him by the end of the month, because of the kindness of Aniruddha Babu. He did not have the luxury of pushing Lakshmi away. Hence it was necessary to come to the landlord's house to meet his niece. In their house servants also dressed better than him; Look at the fate of the girl . Where he had arranged for her to stay in a corner of an old man's house, now Bondita was living a queen’s life.  Zamindar Trilochan Roy Ch...

Uttor

  উত্তর   সারাদিন কাজে মন বসেনা অনিরুদ্ধর। বাইরে অঝোরে বৃষ্টি হতে থাকে, ঝোড়োও হওয়ায় ঘরের পর্দা দোলে , জিনিসপত্র এলোমেলো হয়ে যায়। কয়েলি আসে ছোট মালিকের জিনিস গুছিয়ে দিতে, তিনি কিছু খাবেন কিনা শুধোতে কিন্তু তাকে চলে যেতে বলে ঘরে খিল দেয় অনিরুদ্ধ। একা থাকতে চায়। তার মনে আনাগোনা করে অসংখ প্রশ্ন এবং আশংকা। যে ভাবে বন্দিতা স্বেচ্ছায় মায়ের কাছে গেল আজ, সেরকম সে কোনদিন যায়না । বরং বছরে একবার জামাই ষষ্টিতে যাওয়ার আগেও একশো বার বাড়ির কাজকম্ম দেখে শুনে যায়। বটুকের পরীক্ষা, কারুর শরীর খারাপ হলে তো কথাই নেই। সেই বন্দিতা আজ হঠাৎ বাড়ি যাবে বলে কি তাড়াতাড়ি পোটলা গুছিয়েছে। এতই কি দূরে চলে গেছে সে অনিরুদ্ধের থেকে? তা কি তার নিজের দোষে? ভাবতে থাকে অনিরুদ্ধ। সে দূরে সরিয়ে দিয়েছে বলে অভিমান না কি তাকে স্বামী রূপে গ্রহণ করতে পারেনা বন্দিতা? অনিরুদ্ধ পশ্চাতাপ করে। সত্যি যদি বন্দিতা সব জেনে তাদের সম্পর্ক অস্বীকার করে, তাকে কি দোষ দেওয়া চলে? তবে কি তাই সেদিন রাত্রে জেগে থাকা সত্যেও ঘুমের অভিনয় করছিল সে? কি ভেবেছে সে অনিরুদ্ধের ব্যাপারে? কেন চারিদিক বাছবিচার না করে এমন করল অনিরুদ্ধ? নিজের প্রতিজ্ঞ...

Adornment

The rainy night had given way to a rather pleasant summer morning in Suryapali. The temperature was no longer soaring and a gentle breeze blew through the plains of Suryapali. The sun peeped out through the floating clouds occasionally. Priyambada walked into her chambers after a luncheon to find trays laid with drapes and jewellery, waiting for her. “The Maharani sent this for some celebration in the evening,” Vrinda spoke, bowing at her mistress who nodded silently. Priyambada eyed the trays and exhaled. She wasn’t sure if anyone talked to Ishaan Dev about the rituals. She dismissed Vrinda and decided to read the scripture. As Priyambada sat down on the edge of the bed, scripture in hand, her thoughts travelled to the happenings of the night and she inhaled as her throat felt dry. Why did he stop? Did he feel that he had offended her? Priyambada wondered. She walked up to the attire laid down for the evening and picked up the drape wrapped into a bodice and wrap-around skirt. They w...

Ghore Fera

  ঘরে ফেরা   বন্দিতার মামা মেয়ের সাথে দেখা করতে আসেন তুলশিপুর। গরিবের ঘরের ছা পোষা চেহারা তার, পরনে খাটো ধুতি ও ছিটের জামা। মেয়ের শশুরবাড়িতে খালি হাতে আসা অন্যায় তাই দুটি মিষ্টির হাড়ি সাথে। অনিচ্ছা সত্তেও রায় চৌধুরী বাড়িতে যেতে হয় তাকে। তারা তুলশিপুরের জমিদার, সম্পূর্ণার শ্বশুরের মনিব, তাদের সম্মান করে চলা মঙ্গল। তা ছাড়া যে বোন  ও বোনঝিকে আশ্রয় দেওয়া নিয়ে দিনরাত কথা শোনাতে বাঁধতো না তার, সেই বোন  এখন মাস গেলে তার হাতে টাকা তুলে দেয়, অনিরুদ্ধ বাবুর দয়ায়। হাতে আসা লক্ষ্মী পায়ে ঠেলার বিলাসিতা করার মত মুরোদ নয় তার। অগত্যা বোনঝির সাথে দেখা করতে জমিদার বাড়ি আসা। এদের বাড়ির চাকররাও  তার থেকে ভাল পোশাক পরে; ভাগ্য দেখো মেয়েটার। কোথায় কোন বুড়োর বাড়ির এক কোণে পরে থাকার ব্যবস্থা করেছিল সে, এখন বন্দিতা রাজরানী।  জমিদার ত্রিলোচন রায় চৌধুরীর যাকে পছন্দ নয় তাকে তিনি সেটা বুঝিয়ে দিতে দ্বিধা বোধ করেন না। বন্দিতার মামা তার তেমন এক অপছন্দের পাত্র । বৌমার মুখে তিনি যা  শুনেছেন তারপর বৌমার তাদের প্রতি টান দেখে আশ্চর্য হন ত্রিলোচন বাবু। কিন্তু কুটুম্ব তারা। হাতে কর...

Trust

Ishaan Dev woke up at the sound of the hourly bells and trumpets and found himself alone in bed. It took him some time to realise that he had perhaps overslept as he looked confused, half asleep first at the hourglass and then at the sun rays coming into the chambers through the swaying curtains. He sat up to suddenly remember the happenings of the night, as his eyes travelled to the blood stain on the sheet and he sat in contemplation for a good few minutes. He finally had his moment with Priyambada and it was nothing like he had imagined it to be. A part of him that yearned to touch her and taste her was satisfied enough to realise that his longing for her was not only physical. When bodies entwined in the union, and he had pushed himself in, as he had with a hundred other women before her, something in him felt a different sense of completeness and fulfilment that he realised was missing from his life. He had seen Priyambada react to the sensations that were completely new to her, m...

Gratefulness

Aniruddha did not return home that night, he informed on the telephone that he was stuck in urgent work so he would return home the next day after spending the night at the client's house. Bondita spent a sleepless night. What would she tell Barrister Babu? And why would he believe it? She was lost in her thoughts twisting and turning in bed all night. She was hurt. Was her husband so reluctant towards their relationship that he did not wish to return home because of her? Once he was busy with some work and was pacing in the study room. Bondita was a child. Her Jetha Shoshur Moshai had taught her to serve her husband. She used to see Bihari take a cup of tea to the study room every day. Despite Bihari's resistance, she picked up the cup of tea that day.  "Don't do this, Ginnima ," Bihari was terrified. “Barrister Babu does not like to talk or be disturbed during his work. If he gets angry, I will lose my job.” Bondita ignored his words and entered the study room w...