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Tarabai approached Ishaan Dev with slow, measured steps, following Mallal into his chambers after he summoned her. She stood at a distance watching him doing something with his back to her, her heart thumping in her chest. Tiny droplets of perspiration appeared on her forehead, and her lips felt dry.
“Where is it?” Ishaan Dev glanced over his shoulder while admiring the cleaned sheath of his sword, when Tarabai’s face turned pale.
“Wha… what?” Her voice stuttered as Ishaan Dev frowned, confused and turned to face her.
“You said you are going to the temple. Where are the offerings?” He asked firmly. A little relieved by his query, Tarabai smiled faintly, still unsure of what he knew. Was he testing her? She asked for his permission and proceeded to go back to her chambers, and in the faint light of the lamp, her hand reached the pouch beside the offerings. She shuddered, immediately letting it go as it rolled over the cold floor while she picked up the offerings wrapped in the leaf and quickly went back to his chambers. Ishaan Dev took the offerings to his lips with a small prayer.
“Thank you.” He smiled at her. Tarabai looked taken aback at his words at first. Never before had he thanked her for anything. “Do leave some of it here, I will give it to the Maharani with your best wishes.” He suggested. This relieved Tarabai of her doubt that him spying on her movements.
Tarabai was about to do what she was told, placing the leaf down on the table in front of her, when she stopped, as if Trishaan Dev controlled her mind. Still scared of her thoughts and intentions, she asked, “If you don’t mind, My Lord, can I give this to Her Highness myself?” Ishaan Dev narrowed his eyes at her odd request as Tarabai clutched the leaf in between her palms.
“I will never have a child to call my own. The least I can do…” Her eyes shone in the light of the lamps around the room. Her sentence was cut midway as she controlled herself, and Ishaan Dev suddenly felt a sense of sadness around her. Of course, she was human. Would it be far-fetched for her to have human needs and emotions? He eyed Tarabai, standing in his room, unsurely staring back at him. Ishaan Dev’s throat felt dry. Was he naive to her feelings? Of course not. He did value her, just not in a way she perhaps wanted to be valued. His upbringing taught him to draw the line fairly well. But could he not give her this much happiness?
“You may.” He nodded with a smile, “She will be happy to receive it from you.” He had watched Tarabai leave silently with a short bow. She looked as if something preoccupied her, but it wasn’t his position to have a conversation with a concubine regarding her inner feelings. He never wanted any of them to have the wrong idea. He was well aware, unlike anyone else believed, of his father’s tryst with his favourite concubine, which resulted in a strain on his relationship with his mother and the fact that he always felt his mother was deprived of his love. He was also aware of who Trishaan Dev was. He couldn’t make the same mistakes.
Tarabai was sleepless on what seemed to be the longest night of her life. She twisted and turned in her bed, opened the pouch several times, poured its contents out in her lap and placed them back in the pouch with trembling hands again. Tarabai stared at herself in the unclean mirror of the room, thinking about what life had brought her. What it had given her. Unlike others who spend all their lives in the Kothi blaming their fate and God’s will, she had accepted it more easily the day a strange man pulled her up from her sleep and told her that her father had left her to him. She was scared, alone, and even sometimes unsure, but never blamed her fate or God. Some even said she was brave. Was she? If she were, she would have told Adhiraja about her encounter with Trishaan Dev. Why didn’t she? Perhaps because he wouldn’t believe a concubine over the best friend he grew up with. Or because she knew somewhere in this entire ploy, Trishaan Dev was not alone. If he were caught, she wouldn’t be spared. If he wasn’t caught, she would always be his eyes and ears, even if she didn’t want to be. With dawn, she had made up her mind on what she should do, for her own sake. All her life, she had lived to serve others. Now was the time to be selfish. She summoned Sehri to make her bathe.
“Get me my best attire, I have a meeting with the Maharani.” Tarabai smiled at the girl who ran at her instructions.
Maharani Priyambada was getting ready for the courtroom in her chambers as Vrinda brushed her hair and two maids helped her with her jewellery. It was Urvi who came to her room and bowed to inform her that Tarabai was there to see her. The maids exchanged rather shocked and judgmental looks, while Vrinda gasped involuntarily. Had they ever heard a concubine enter the chambers of a Maharani? Oh, what a sin!
“Let her in,” Priyambada smiled at a confused Urvi. “I was expecting her.”
Tarabai had entered the room as the judgmental eyes hawked her every move. She looked up at the mirror, as Priyambada sat with her back to Tarabai, her face visibly glowing in the morning sunshine.
“I heard you went to the temple for me yesterday?” Maharani Priyambada smiled as she got up, placing her hand involuntarily over her stomach. Tarabai’s eyes travelled to her hand, painted and shining with jewellery. She wasn’t showing yet.
“Are you going to the courtroom, Maharani?” She sounded concerned, “Did I interrupt…”
“Oh no, I was expecting you. I have been quite bored around my chambers, so I just…” Priyambada stopped, for now, the maids were turning their heads at her. She was engaging in banter with her husband’s favourite concubine.
“I… got you…” Tarabai held out the offerings. Priyambada smiled and took them. Urvi was about to take it from her hand, but Priyambada touched it to her forehead and ate it. Tarabai’s throat went dry as she cleared it to speak, “Umm… I'd better not keep you…” Priyambada nodded as she bowed and promptly left. Tarabai ran to her room and shut the door behind her as she wiped the perspiration off her forehead. She glanced over at the sand clock shining in the rays and the empty pouch that lay beside it.
The court session was a mundane one. Neelambargarh had lost its two best ministers, and Ishaan Dev had decided to take up the Defence himself and handed the Finances over to one of the other ministers. A few issues were discussed, but none reached a valid conclusion. Further debates ensued. Ishaan Dev, even while he was engrossed in the ministers debating their cause, eyed Priyambada, sitting on the high chair beside his, more than once, but she still gave him an annoyed warning glance to make him stop. After the court session rolled into the afternoon, Ishaan Dev raised his hand, dismissing the men, assuring them they would continue the next day. The last thing he wanted was for his pregnant wife to skip lunch. Urvi helped Priyambada back to her chambers. It wasn’t until after lunch, when the peacocks were heard at a distance and the afternoon rolled into dusk, that Priyambada suddenly felt slightly uneasy. She was perhaps tired, so she lay down to rest, but couldn’t sleep. Her restlessness alerted Urvi and worried Vrinda. After her repeated requests not to inform Adhiraja, Urvi suggested she would get into trouble and let Devdoot inform him. Ishaan Dev was perplexed. He was already against her attending court and thought she might have over-exerted herself. The medicine men were summoned immediately, and Urvi led them down the hallway to her chambers. The palace was suddenly silenced as the sunset brought in the darkness around it.
Adhiraj Ishaan Dev was strolling across the terrace on his wing, the moonlight making the surroundings quite easily visible, murmuring a soft prayer under his breath for moments that looked like hours as he waited with bated breath for news of her well-being. The bell tower in the north suddenly rang once. Then twice and thrice. Ishaan Dev looked up, his heart skipping a beat at the third ring. He was not alien to the concept of emergency bells ringing in Suryapali’s palace. The code for these was the same across the land. Three times meant someone was probably nearing death. His throat went dry as he heard Devdoot call out to him from the threshold. The urgency in his voice made Ishaan’s heart sink. “Your Majesty! Come with me immediately!”
