Hijr: Letter One

In these thoughts to my soul,

I know not what to write, yet I shall, for these ears are drawn towards your home.
It is the most foreign of lands that we call our home, where I and everyone who left the citadel have settled. A million graces of the heavens that before innumerable gnashes sheared away our desire to walk further, we found this sweet-smelling land by the Sarasvati, a river so full of life and plentiful. Although an envelope of sadness always wraps around our cotton, the conviction keeps the lamp burning.

By the grace of Lord Pashupatinath, I wish good health and happiness for you. Wish that is all I can muster for now, as I am well aware of how torn your heart must be, shattered into uncountable pieces of glass. Such is your grief, I know, your liveliness parched as a desert. We came with nothing, broke apart with nothing and slept with nothing; a bouquet of memories is all we have to share with our graves.

The sunset is strange, just like the day I had left and you stood by the Bath; your doe eyes, resplendent with the hues of setting dusk. Not a word escaped your lips, but I heard your sob and you mine. That sunset continues to haunt me despite all these years. The gravel and silt from the hills have settled under the river, but my anguish has built a fort around my heart. Under the moonlight, when all fires have been extinguished and all speeches have been hushed, I sit in silence, watching the path towards you.

Oh! If only I could scribble in the wind. There aren't enough stones to inscribe my words for you. So, I shall keep it short.

The mornings begin differently than at the citadel. We have cows that I graze in the riverine pastures. The foreigners haven't yet discovered the beauty of this land, and we dare not dwell too far. We never knew the feeling of being imprisoned in freedom. Maybe we have to move again, or our grave will be dug on these very lands in the years to come. But, for now, our stocks are plentiful, the baths are brimming, the kiln is busy baking the bricks, and the priests mellow the fears of our kin.

In the past tide, waves of joy spread over our settlement as our boats returned with wealth and piles of riches from the sea lands. We rose from destitution, but know not how long we can sustain; the houses are lit with dances by the Bath, and we celebrate as we did at the citadel. We again found our appetite for jewellery, and the old potter's son now carves mesmerising pieces as lavish gifts.

All the world's wealth is in our thriving new settlement, yet there is a void. We are adorned in dazzling metal jewellery and cotton attire, but the poverty of our happiness wreaks havoc in our sleep. I hear the younger ones cry out with nightmares, and men spend the night watching the roads while elders patiently wait to be carried to the mound. We have everything, yet nothing.

And I? As the endless streams meet the sea, our streams will confluence in the sea of eternity. That shall be our home, where our souls shall light the night, and days will be spent in the cold embraces of our decaying selves.

I shall end here, for I fear a word more will burden you. I shall scatter the stone tablets on the way I took to leave you behind. I am glad that our trade led us to the Egyptian friends whose writing on tablets fascinated me. In the tenebrosity of this detachment, may my words illuminate your way to mine!

The ever-destitute in your memory,

𑀳𑀺𑀦𑁆𑀤𑀯𑀺

The Pashupatinath seal reveals a form of Shiva with a headgear surrounded by animals, indicating an overlord or God of the civilisation. As Indus Valley scriptures are yet to be deciphered, it is very difficult to understand the culture solely based on archaeological findings and assumptions.

Towards You

The Afghans, after Sher Shah Suri's untimely demise, were at loggerheads for power. Their troops near Mewar were now led by Mehmood Shah. They secretly captured territories in the forests and waited to attack Mewari camps when the time was right. Rawat Chundawat and his spies had confirmed the news, and Udai Singh sent a warning to Mehmood Shah to withdraw his troops from Mewar in vain. Now that it was out in the open, it was time they declared war. Mehmood Shah had limited resources in Mewar. His internal rebellion against his commander did not help his cause. His spies clearly suggested that in no way could he win, especially with Kunwar Pratap leading his troops. He was having second thoughts about the war. It was then that one of his aides suggested a perfect plan. Maharani Jaivanta Bai had decided to go to the Mahakaleshwar Temple near the outskirts of Chittorgarh, in the forestlands of Bhilwara. They had travelled a long way and across the Gambhiri river that meandered during...

Purnota: Chapter Twenty Five

I t took Trilochon half a day to figure out something was wrong at home. Since he was back, Somnath did not talk to him at all, and Aniruddha looked visibly upset. They avoided each other at the dining table and the living room. Trilochon was not comfortable with asking Ashalata anything. In the evening, as Kalindi poured tea from the pot, Trilochon groaned inwardly. “It’s not even six months since he got married, and she has started a war between brothers.” Kalindi stopped pouring the tea as she turned to him. “What?” She asked, a little cluelessly. “If I had chosen a bride…” Trilochon stopped at Kalindi’s disapproving stare. “What makes you say that?” She asked rather calmly. “Well, I never saw Som and Aniruddha fight until she came here.” Kalindi looked amused at his words. “You are the type for whom people hate in-laws.” “Pardon?” Trilochon narrowed his brows. “What do you mean?” “Bondita. Ask Bondita.” Kalindi shook her head. “I told her it was a bad idea to work with him.” “You h...

My Everything

Kunwar Pratap stormed into the Mahal at Gogunda amidst uncertainty and chaos. Happy faces of the chieftains and soldiers welcomed him as Rawat Chundawat, and some other chieftains stopped the ongoing Raj Tilak. A visibly scared Kunwar Jagmal looked clueless at a visibly angry Kunwar Pratap. Rani Dheerbai Bhatiyani hadn't expected Kunwar Pratap to show up, that too, despite her conveying to him his father's last wish of crowning Kunwar Jagmal. Twenty-one days after Udai Singh's death, she was finally close to a dream she had dared to dream since Jagmal was born. He was not informed about the Raj Tilak as per Dheerbai's instructions. She eyed Rawat Ji. He must have assembled the chiefs to this revolt against her son, against the dead king. No one except them knew where Kunwar Pratap was staying. It was for the safety of his family. " What are you doing, Chotima?" A disappointed voice was directed at her. She could stoop down so low? For the first time, an anger...

Purnota: Chapter Twenty Seven

A week had passed since Binoy left, and Bondita found herself trying to get used to Aniruddha’s bouts of aloofness. On one hand, she was glad that Binoy and Aniruddha had talked things out and seemed to be on talking terms, but on the other, since Binoy left, she could not help but notice Aniruddha pushing her further away. He barely talked to her except for work, and she did not know what she had done wrong to deserve this coldness. She wished he would talk to her, and she could tell him that he was hurting her, but she kept a brave face and decided not to. At work, she was informed by her Senior Lawyer, Mitra, about the promotion Aniruddha had suggested for her. “A promotion?” She was surprised as he nodded. “Yes, from assisting him to having a cubicle downstairs.” Mitra thought it was good news for her, given how the Boss’s temper ran. Bondita smiled faintly. He also informed her that he would let her know for sure that week. Her desk would be moved soon. Aniruddha was away for a ca...

Purnota: Chapter Twenty Four

Aniruddha let the shower run as his skin erupted into goosebumps under the cold water. He breathed out and removed the locks of wet hair from his face. He turned off the shower, wrapped the towel lowly around his waist and walked back to the room, not caring about the wet floor from the water dripping down his torso. He lay on the bed as his body soaked the blanket. He stared at the ceiling, stretching his arms over his head. Bondita’s promise played on his mind in a loop. “I will not leave… I will never leave.” He wanted to believe her. He wanted one person he could fall back on, trusting them to catch him when he stumbled. But his experiences proved him otherwise. He remembered that day as vividly as if it were yesterday. He had bought a scarf for Bondita from Palika Bazaar as a truce because he felt bad leaving home after fighting with her. He had tried to be patient with her and sat her down numerous times to make her understand why boarding school would benefit her. Aniruddha...

Purnota: Chapter Twenty Three

“So the question is, do the slum dwellers get their dues to relocate, or do they protest on the road, grabbing media attention? If one of them mentions the sewage project where all this started, we can’t guarantee not dragging certain names then. It will be beyond our control.” Bondita breathed in as she eyed everyone at the table. The conference hall of ARC & Associates had an oval table with a whiteboard, projector and podium and sitting around the table were a stenographer, Bondita’s secondary attorney, Debashish Ghosal, the contractor and his attorney Biswas, the representative of the NGO with the Union leader of the slum, Trilochon, Somnath and Aniruddha. The people of the NGO appreciated her strategy with a nod. Ghoshal looked perplexed as his lawyer whispered something in his ear. Somnath did not look up from the table as Aniruddha passed a note to Trilochon in writing. “Now the decision is yours.” Bondita continued. “We are keen on out-of-court settlement if our basic ...

Purnota: Chapter Twenty Six

Bondita was surprised to find Binoy in the living room of the Roy Chowdhury house as she entered the premises early in the morning. Trilochon sat with his brother, looking serious as they discussed some paperwork, as Bihari walked out with tea. Noticing Bondita so early in the morning, Trilochon looked up questioningly. “I have some errands to run before the office.” Bondita smiled as Trilochon nodded. She had to pay some bills and deliver some of the orders Kalindi had finished because her ankle hurt in the morning. Trilochon enquired about her need for medicines as Bondita reassured him that she had made sure of it. Bondita briefly eyed Binoy, who showed no interest in her or the conversation, as he remained focused on the papers. Bondita cleared her throat, informing Trilochon that she should be on her way. “I think you should show her the papers, Binoy.” Trilochon stopped her as he suggested to Binoy, who eyed Bondita briefly. He looked unsure as Bondita opened her mouth, shaking h...

Purnota: Chapter Twenty Eight

“I… made tomorrow’s schedule.” Bondita cleared her throat. She was about to leave the study room after she had made the next day’s schedule for Aniruddha to check when he entered the house. He seemed preoccupied, as he did not notice her presence and walked towards the study room, only to stop at the threshold and spot her pretending to arrange the files. Aniruddha moved away from the threshold towards his desk, making space for her to leave as he removed his glasses and placed them down. “You should take that job in Kolkata.” Bondita stopped but did not turn as he continued. “It's a good opportunity to make contacts in the High Court and get paid well.” Bondita’s throat dried as she did not respond. “Thamma can stay here, you can visit on weekends.” He wanted her to leave; what more could she say? She walked away without exchanging any words. Aniruddha sat in the high chair, watching her leave as he sighed. He clasped his hands together, realising they were sweaty. He sudde...

His Wife

" Where is the Kesar, Rama? And the Kalash?" Ajabdeh looked visibly displeased at the ladies who ran around. " They are at the fort gates, and nothing is ready yet!" She exclaimed. She was clad in a red lehenga and the jewellery she had inherited as the first Kunwarani of the crown prince. Little Amar ran down the hallway towards his mother. " Maasa Maasa... who is coming with Daajiraj?" His innocent question made her heart sink. " Bhanwar Ji." Sajja Bai called out to him. " Come here, I will tell you." Amar rushed to his Majhli Dadisa., " Ajabdeh." She turned at Jaivanta Bai's call. "They are here." " M... My Aarti thali..." Ajabde looked lost like never before. Jaivanta Bai held her stone-cold hands, making her stop. She patted her head and gave her a hug. The hug gave her the comfort she was looking for as her racing heart calmed down. Jaivanta Bai left her alone with her thaal. " Maa sa!" ...

Purnota: Chapter Twenty Nine

“Boro Malik is waiting for you.” Bihari’s words made Aniruddha look confused. “He has something to talk about.” Aniruddha eyed the watch on his left hand; it was past dinner time. He stepped into the house to find voices in the living room. He walked in curiously and found Trilochon speaking to a guest. “There he is!” Before Aniruddha could answer Trilochon’s queries, his eyes fell on the guest. Saudamini stood up, turning to him with a formal smile. She looked different with the Sindoor and Shakha Pola, a Tant saree and a gold chain around her neck. Aniruddha was a little surprised to see her, and it showed on his face, perhaps as Trilochon briefed him that Mini was here to sell off the property belonging to her father and wanted some legal advice. Aniruddha nodded, smiling back at her as he directed her to the study. “Oh, Mini is here to sell off the house.” Bondita looked wide-eyed at Kalindi and shook her head. “Why did you not tell me that before? I will go see her now.” She was a...

RAABTA

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