Efforts

"They will be here in…" Pratap stopped at the threshold of Ajabdeh's room, a bit alarmed. He assumed Kasturi was there to help, but she wasn't. His eyes stopped at his wife struggling with a necklace chain that was stuck to the zipper of her knee-length black dress. Her hair was held up in tangled locks over her head with one hand as she struggled with the zipper with the other hand. 

"Damn it. I will be right downstairs. Can you send Kasturi up to help?" She said, half turning to him. 

"I… okay." Pratap turned back and shut the door behind him. He took a deep breath as memories of their wedding night haunted him. He sighed. He then knocked at the door and peeped in. 

"I couldn't find her. Do you need help?" He asked, looking away. 

"Yes. Get this thing out. It's stuck." She said swiftly. He walked into the room and closed the door behind him. She held up the locks of hair out of the way with both hands and faced the wall. He walked up behind her and started undoing the necklace carefully with the tip of his finger. As soon as Ajabdeh felt his warm breath on her neck, she knew this was a bad idea. She had successfully kept him away all this while and feigned her disinterest quite well. She couldn't be weak at the moment and show him her longing. One thing Ajabdeh knew about her husband in half a decade of marital life was that he could read her eyes too well. She closed her eyes to control her breathing as his fingers lingered on her neck and back. He hadn't been so intimately close to her in months. She couldn't blame him for it. She had carefully kept her distance throughout the pregnancy and miscarriage till now. Truth be said, the pressure of having a child was so much that even in between the miscarriages, they didn't try to rekindle the romance. Today, after years, she felt the kind of butterflies she felt when he touched her for the first time. Ajabdeh inhaled, hoping the thoughts would go away. His hand stopped struggling with the necklace chain. 

"Are you okay?" His voice sounded alarmed. She nodded. He continued the struggle. 

Her perfume hit his nostrils and played tricks with his brain. His fingers lingered a little on her bare skin as he tried to free the zipper. Her breathing was almost careful. He noticed that. His throat went dry. He finally freed the chain and lowered the zipper so that it didn't get tangled again. Her lingerie was visible just where his hand stopped at the zip. At the moment, Pratap wanted his hands to wander. He wanted her to lean in closer. He wanted to taste her lips and make love to her. As soon as his hands lingered on her bare back, Ajabdeh jolted away, making him regain his self-control.

"Thank you." She managed. "I will be downstairs in a minute." 

She made the mistake of looking up at his eyes. She could see the longing in them, and she knew hers reflected the same. She was quick to look away. He took a step towards her, making her heart beat faster. No, no, no. All the efforts she made to look indifferent all these days would go down the drain. He touched her warm cheek with his cold hand, making her look up at him. 

"Thank you for everything." His voice was hoarse. Before Ajabdeh could react, his lips touched her parted lips gently enough to just brush on them, then he moved away and walked out of the room, leaving her pining for more. 

Ajabdeh sat down on the dressing pouffe and exhaled. It was a thank-you kiss. For what? Hosting his friends? Perhaps. She drank down a glass of water. Why was she hoping for more? She knew what was at stake. She needed to act now. She couldn't throw it all away. She dialled a number with trembling hands. 

"Did you get the papers ready?" She asked, "When do I receive them?"

Pratap stopped in the empty corridor in front of the staircase. He sighed. Was she angry with him for that? Should he not have done it? Damn. He punched his fist at the wall. Why did I thank her? For a moment, Pratap was scared. Scared of hurting her. Or perhaps pushing her. He didn't want her health progress to be hampered by his irrational behaviour. After he had a talk with Dr Sekhawat about Ajabdeh's session that week, he was a bit relieved to hear that the work and keeping busy were doing her health some good, as were the sessions. He also suggested not letting her be alone. It alarmed Pratap. All she wanted to do right now was to be alone and start afresh. Under stress, he had called Heer and passed on the information about progress. 

"So what do you think?" Heer asked over the call as Shakti frowned.

"You know what scares me the most?" He asked.

"What?"

"That somewhere in this Dadabhai is losing his hope and giving in to her idea." He sounded low.

"No, that's not possible." Heer sounded scared.

"I am afraid it is." Shakti nodded. "I don't know why they don't talk to each other about their feelings."

"Maybe it's easier said than done. Both of them feel extremely vulnerable." Heer suggested. Shakti agreed.

"We can't sit around and wait for a disaster, can we?" He sounded restless. 

"There is nothing we can do. People in between them have made it worse. Remember?" Heer calmed him.

"It's all my fault." Shakti snapped. "I failed to be a friend and a brother."

"That's not true." Heer sighed. "We tried our best. Now it's fate."

"Speaking of which, did Rukaiya tell you?" Shakti asked.

"Yes. We knew he would propose someday. Both of them are unsure when to tell Dadabhai and Jija." Heer spoke, "But I reassured them that no matter what happens, they will always be happy for their friends."

Pratap was a bit relaxed to see Ajabdeh's indifference towards him at the dinner. She was a warm host to his friends and didn't wince at their referral to him as a lucky man.

"The meal was delicious." Elina complimented as they sat by the bonfire on the lawn. "Your home is beautiful."

"Actually, it is my grandparents' home. And Pratap did a good job restoring it." Ajabdeh smiled. 

"Well, he has a lot of talent." Elina agreed. 

"So, want to do something fun?" Ajay walked out of the house with a blanket and Pratap in tow with drinks. 

"What fun?" Elina seemed excited.

"Anything else than hearing two ladies gossip is fun," Ajay smirked as Elina slapped his hand and pulled him to sit beside her. Ajabdeh moved away. It kind of made her uncomfortable with how touchy-feely this couple was in public. Maybe because they were newly engaged and the romance was fresh. Her eyes unknowingly travelled to Pratap. They were newly married once. But things were very different. Was she jealous? She looked up to see Ajay kiss Elina's hand and smile.

"Drinks?" Pratap poured them some wine. Ajabdeh smiled slightly. He was as uncomfortable with their PDA as she was. 

"Let's play a game." Elina looked excited. 

"What game?" Ajay asked.

"It's called how well you know each other." Elina smiled. "We played it at a party once."

"And won obviously since we know each other pretty well." Ajay smiled. 

"I don't think that's a good idea." Pratap shook his head.

"Yeah. We can try dumb charades." Ajabdeh suggested.

"Or Chinese whispers," Pratap added.

"Nonsense." Elina dismissed their idea. "Are you scared you will give wrong answers?" She made them steal a glance. 

"Let's do this." Ajabdeh smiled, surprising Pratap with her attitude. He shook his head and gave in. He knew what it was. Ajabdeh was a winner. She loved challenges. And Elina had just challenged her. 

"We will write down the answers to a set of questions about ourselves that the opponent gives and hand them over to them. They will ask our partners about our choices. The couple with the most number of right questions about each other wins." Elina explained.

"Great. We are playing Koffee with Karan on our lawn." Pratap taunted as Ajay laughed.

"Oh, it's fun. Trust me. We always win."

"Yeah, you said it once," Ajabdeh spoke. "Let's do it."

Midway through the game, Elina observed how she was still unaware of the simple things in Ajay's preferences. Like his favourite colour or favourite time of the day. She didn't know if he preferred to choose his own clothes or how much time he took to decide on major life choices. Ajabdeh's questions jolted her. On the other hand, Ajabdeh couldn't help but notice how superficial their questions were. Beach or mountains, tea or coffee… Pratap smiled at it. He remembered how he always found these questions irrelevant to compatibility. Almost in a reflex, his eyes travelled to meet hers. He knew she thought the same. He shook his head. Ajabdeh Punwar never lost. How was she so easily giving up on the only thing she shouldn't have lost?

After the guests left, Pratap sat down on the couch in the family room, exhausted. He had just shut his eyes and inhaled when Kasturi came and made him stare as she bowed. 

"Ma'am is asking for you." He got up at her words, a little alarmed. Memories of the evening came floating back. 

"Where is she?" He asked.

"In the library." Kasturi bowed and left. 

Ajabdeh looked up from her book as he came into the room. 

"So the renovations are done, and we can leave the day after tomorrow." She said, looking back into the book rather indifferently. "And I arranged for the attorneys to meet us here tomorrow. It would be easier that way." He looked up at her words and inhaled. She sounded cold. Everything that happened in the evening was a dream he had. "Do you think we should meet the Sekhawats before leaving? I have an appointment with him anyway." She waited for his answer.

"Do whatever you feel like doing." His voice sounded hurt as he turned around and walked out of the room. Ajabdeh sighed.

Pratap sat down at the edge of his bed, tired and frustrated. He had watched all day how Ajabdeh, in her old enthusiasm, prepared to welcome his guests. The more actively Ajabdeh participated in deciding the menus, how to entertain the guests, and what to wear, the more distant and suffocated Pratap felt. He had tried everything he possibly could do for all these days. A month went by too quickly for his liking, and he hated to admit how his situation hadn't improved. He tried sharing chores, cooking for her, reminding her of the better days, making small gestures of care, and spending time together to make her realise they could be happy. He had always assumed actions spoke louder than words. But sadly, after every laughter, he had seen her face turn pale, after every brief moment of joy, he had seen her drift away into sadness and guilt. He didn't know what else to do. There had been days she had been totally normal with him. And days when she reminded him how quickly she wanted to get over this so that he would sign the papers. He wanted to hold on so badly, but time was like sand slipping through his fingers as he tried to tighten his grip. He lay down on his bed in frustration, clutching his pillow to his chest. One more day.