Skip to main content

TU HI APNA PARAYA

 Jivanta glanced over to the hospital bench opposite hers, where Pratap sat, his eyes fixed on the corridor where they had wheeled Roshni to the ICU. She couldn’t understand anything. She had asked Roshni and she had repeated there was no… what irked Jivanta was how she was genuinely concerned about a man she barely knew who caused her so much humiliation. She didn’t give herself credit for being so kind or weak. She found a woman around her age approach, Pratap, as he got up at her sight, and hugged her tight. 

“It will be fine.” The woman whispered as Pratap let out what Jivanta thought was a sob. Did he love Roshni that much? Jivanta sighed trying to look away from them as Pratap brought the woman over to her.

“This is my mother.” He spoke, his voice still hoarse. Jivanta looked up at the woman who smiled faintly. “Roshni is a strong child, she will be fine.” Hansa sat down beside Jivanta as Pratap went to get them some tea, while they talked.

“Did you… meet her?” Jivanta asked after an awkward silence.

“Only once did she come home. But honestly, I didn’t think they are…” Hansa stopped with a smile. “But then, he never brought any girl home I should have known.”

“I don’t understand anything,” Jivanta confessed, a little puzzled. “I asked her and she said she had nobody. She never mentioned him and…”

“As far as I know they met on her Chittorgarh trip.” Hansa smiled.

“But that was… recently?” Jivanta raised her eyebrows as Hansa nodded.

“But you know what they say about love. Time doesn’t matter because soulmates travel with each other through seven lives.” Hansa’s words made Jivanta look up and ask, almost sarcastically, “You believe in love and all that?”

“Why not?” Hansa shrugged “It is perfectly plausible. I had loved once. Yes, he left us early because he had no choice but I know in my heart he loved me and who knows he is probably waiting for me somewhere.”

“You sound saintly. Almost perfect to be true.” Jivanta shook her head. “I don’t know. I know nothing about him or them to give my blessings.”

“That is justified, so make a choice only after you have heard them out. Once Roshni is better.” For the first time, Hansa saw Jivanta look weak as she sighed and choked saying “They said there was a lot of blood loss…”

“She will be fine,” Hansa reassured her. “My sister-in-law used to say, love is the strongest force of nature. It makes mothers. It can never be weak. The strength of your love and his is with Roshni.” Jivanta wiped her tears and inhaled.

“Your sister-in-law seems wise.”

“She was, she was widowed at eighteen but never had I heard her complain. One day she just renounced everything and left. Pratap used to be around her all the time. I may not vouch for my upbringing but I can vouch for hers. Meera didi’s Pratap would never wrong your daughter.” Jivanta nodded silently at Hansa’s words as Pratap offered them tea. He was relieved to see Jivanta was a little less uptight with him since his mother arrived. After an hour a nurse came looking for the family and said she had regained consciousness. A relieved Jivanta wiped her tears in a smile and turned to see Pratap wipe his tears as she made up her mind. Jivanta realised that the love she heard of, resented and saw Hansa believe in was something she had never felt before. Her parents resented her as a daughter, and her husband never loved her. She tried to be as less affectionate towards Roshni as possible. Love hurt her and made her weak, and she believed Roshni should be prepared for the worst of it. She didn’t realise that the same love made her a protective mother, and gave her the will to live for her child’s better future and there was no way she could deny Roshni her chance at love.

“Go and see her.” Her words startled Pratap as he looked at his mother who nodded and smiled.

His touch on her cheeks gently woke her up. Roshni blinked as her vision cleared and she could see him smiling even with his bruises.

“Are you hurt?” She asked, a little alarmed, as he shook his head.

“I didn’t expect you would come.” She spoke softly. "But I hoped..."

“I wasn't sure I would either.” He shook his head.

“Then why did you?” Roshni asked, with raised eyebrows. Pratap smiled faintly.

“Because I felt like this is not the first time I was losing you, and I couldn't stand that empty feeling." His eyes shone as she smiled faintly,"... and I had to tell you something, and take you somewhere.” Roshni looked puzzled at his last words.

“And what made you think I’d go with you?” She raised her eyebrows slightly and realised her head hurt. She winced as he looked concerned for a moment.

“I don’t know. I still don’t know what I feel and what I do and why I do it…” he confessed.

“Maasa?” She asked worriedly.

“She is the one who sent me here.” He reassured, holding her hand, with a smile as she sighed relieved.

“What do we do now?” Roshni asked, confused. “Tell the world our story?”

“Is our story here and now?" His voice seemed distant and she felt a shiver down her spine. "No. It was there before this life and it will continue after us." She smiled faintly as her teary eyes made him wipe away the droplets before they reached her cheeks, " We keep our story within us and give them a story they would believe in.” Pratap shook his head. “Not all stories are meant for the world to understand. You know who used to say that?”

“Meera Ma?” Roshni guessed.

“Yes, she talked of how humans are capable of all kinds of love. Like that of her namesake Mira Bai and her Giridhar. Hidden from the world was love, so deep that even cupid was jealous.” Roshni nodded at Pratap, “So we tell them we met at Chittorgarh?”

“And fell in love at Bijoliya.” he nodded with a smile. “Where is the lie?”

“So… that’s it? How it starts?” Roshni asked, suddenly a little awkward as he smiled at her. 

“It starts here… with… I love you, now, forever and beyond this life.” Pratap gently kissed her forehead as her eyes sparkled. “And I am never giving up on us.”

“I love you too and I am not giving up either.” Roshni agreed.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Towards You

The Afghans, after Sher Shah Suri's untimely demise, were at loggerheads for power. Their troops near Mewar were now led by Mehmood Shah. They secretly captured territories in the forests and waited to attack Mewari camps when the time was right. Rawat Chundawat and his spies had confirmed the news, and Udai Singh sent a warning to Mehmood Shah to withdraw his troops from Mewar in vain. Now that it was out in the open, it was time they declared war. Mehmood Shah had limited resources in Mewar. His internal rebellion against his commander did not help his cause. His spies clearly suggested that in no way could he win, especially with Kunwar Pratap leading his troops. He was having second thoughts about the war. It was then that one of his aides suggested a perfect plan. Maharani Jaivanta Bai had decided to go to the Mahakaleshwar Temple near the outskirts of Chittorgarh, in the forestlands of Bhilwara. They had travelled a long way and across the Gambhiri river that meandered during...

Purnota: Chapter Three

“Did you ask for me, Dadu?” Bondita asked as the old man smiled at her. She looked fresh, with her hair neatly braided and a cotton pleated skirt, Thamma sewn with a faded top of one of her cousins, as she stood before the old man sitting on the porch. “Yes indeed, Didibhai, you didn’t come for chess yesterday.” The man smiled. “Oh, Pradhan Jyatha wanted me to look out for the …” She stopped as she saw Aniruddha walking towards them down the corridor. She eyed him as the old man followed her gaze. “Oh Aniruddha Babu, come here. This is Bondita Das.” Aniruddha smiled at the child as she looked away. “She is the only girl in the village who has appeared for her final examinations this year. She is very intelligent and…” Aniruddha nodded “She helped me a lot yesterday.” He made her look up, with a cold stare at him as he smiled politely. “Yes, I have called her here to show you around the village. He wants to see the affected areas of the Adivasis, Bondita.” The old man made her nod. “But...

She Left...

The war was over and so were the hopes of regaining Chittor. The Battle at Haldighati had robbed the Rana of all his wealth, and brave men, and bruised him for life. Trying to match up to Akbar or rather Raja Man Singh's army with one-third its strength had cost his bravery dearly. He had lost his friend and companion. He had brushed past death. The only good thing that this war ensured was that Akbar accepted that he cannot have Mewar. His army retreated and left the country in peace after almost two decades and seventeen wars. This war gave something else too. Kunwar Shakti came to help his brother in his time of need. He lived up to his brother's expectations of being loyal to his family. A heavy-hearted Rana Pratap Singh was overseeing the construction work on his lost friend's memorial right where he died, trying to save his master. The Bronze statue of the life-like Chetak stood tall but was no match for the void Chetak has left behind. He was lost in his thoughts as ...

You Deserve More

Ajabdeh woke up with the song of birds as she felt something warm on her hand. Her eyes went wide. Her hand was on the pillow in between them, between his hands, clasped as he slept. She thought of removing it slowly, but he was holding on to it so tightly. Ajabdeh's heart beat faster and faster. What do I do now? How do I not wake him? What if... why is my hand in his? She was utterly confused.   " Am I...In love?" Pratap was staring at the sleeping figure on the bed as he stared back at the rain. Then he frowned as he noticed that she shivered. He closed the windows of the room to make it cosy, then sat on his side of the bed. A lamp flickered on her side like always, and he stared at her sleeping figure as he put his blanket over her as well. She shifted a little in her sleep to make herself cosy again. Her payals and bangles made a rhythmic sound, breaking the silence of the room. Her hand was out of her blanket and on the pillow in between. He tried to slowly put it ...

Purnota: Chapter Four

The group of youth provided by the Pradhan proved efficient for Aniruddha’s liking as they helped him survey the villages, create a set of data and provide a rough idea of how much fund was needed to rebuild the roofs and fallen walls. “What if we make them permanent? That way, the next cyclone will cause less damage. Pakka houses may also get other facilities like toilets and…” Aniruddha suggested as his eyes shone in the flickering light of the dimly lit kerosene lamp in the living room of Pradhan’s house. Drops of perspiration had formed on his forehead in the load-shedding, and the mosquitoes buzzed around them. For the first two nights, Aniruddha could barely sleep in the unfamiliar surroundings with buzzing insects, sounds of the unknown, and eerie animals here and there at a distance. Stories of snakes climbing up to the second floor through windows despite the mosquito net protecting his four-poster bed kept him alarmed. By the third day, after a day’s survey through the villag...

Purnota: Chapter Six

Kalindi waited outside the hut, on the torn mat they usually slept on, using the hand fan to drive away mosquitoes as she stared at the empty path leading out of the house, the path Bondita had taken some time back. It was almost an hour. Did the foolish girl escape or land in trouble? To her relief, she could hear her nephew snoring away indoors, reassuring her that they were at least not caught by the villagers till now. She was sure Bondita would return empty-handed and hurt, and that she would have no other way than to accept the proposal from the Pradhan. That morning, her Kaka would accompany Sarkar Moshai to the adjacent village to talk to a family friend of the Sarkars. They were looking for a bride for their sixteen-year-old eldest son, who worked as a labourer in Sealdah. Kalindi had tears in her eyes. Not much had changed in these years; not much of women’s fate was different, wasn't it? Kalindi was about ten years old when her father took her to the Roy Chowdhury house ...

A Heart at War

Legend has it that Pratap had to struggle for his father Rana Udai Singh's approval on his wedding with the daughter of Bijoliya's chieftain's daughter, Ajbante Kanwar Punwar. It is so because he was the crown prince and his first queen was supposed to be the next queen of Mewar. Hence his father expected his first bride to be a powerful princess who would aid his political needs. But stubborn as he always was, Kunwar Pratap had other plans. The water of the Bhimlat was still. The sound of the waterfall could be heard in the silent afternoon in the dense forest. A pebble caused ripples in the water and alerted the horse gazing nearby. He looked up at the source of the stone. Then began grazing peacefully once again. The source of the stone however was far from being peaceful. His face wore a frown as he stared around restlessly for the umpteenth time. He sat unmindful on the large rock on the bank of the water body watching the ripples closely, lost in thoughts. The soun...

Purnota: Chapter Five

Aniruddha finished reading the book he had carried with him in the dim light of the bulb in his room and decided to pack it away. He was leaving in a few days and wanted to make sure he left nothing behind. The construction work on the school had started, and the Panchayat wanted to give him a thankful farewell he humbly refused. The spotlight should be on Trilochon to help with his next election campaign. Aniruddha did not want to associate himself with the party or the job. He contemplated going back home and telling his father that he had decided to pursue a career in India instead of his initial plan of going back to London. He had been giving it a thought for quite some time, and the day he said it out loud to Bondita, he knew in his subconscious mind he had already decided on it. The more he saw the village, the more sure he was that he was needed by his countrymen. Dadu put faith in him that he could be part of something bigger than himself and his career, and he intended to kee...

Life and You

" Maharanisa! Maharanisa!" The maid-in-waiting ran through the quiet Rani Mahal as Jaivanta Bai, who was sitting in front of the Lord in her room ever since she was back, rushed out of her room, followed by Sajjabai and Veerbai. " What happened?" She asked, her voice calm, but her heart thumping. " Kunwarsa is here... with Kunwarani... She... She...." The maid sobbed as Jaivanta Bai rushed to the room. She stood at the door as her eyes could not believe what she saw. Kunwar Pratap was soaked in her blood as he laid her down on the bed, shouting, " Quick. Rajvaidya..." His eyes stopped at the door as Jaivanta Bai rushed to be beside the unconscious Ajabdeh. The Daasis and Sevaks were running about soon enough. Sajja Bai gasped at the scene. So much blood. Kunwar Pratap had not noticed anything except her calm, unconscious face. Now that he noticed his blood-soaked hands, red, he stared at them as though in a trance. "Kunwar Pratap! Tell me w...

Unsaid

"Keep the Lehenga in this one, that jewellery in the box." Jaivanta Bai was ordering the ladies in the Ranimahal around. Kunwar Shakti entered with an equally stunned Kunwar Pratap at the scene as the hall turned into a mini market thanks to their mothers. " Kunwar Pratap is here." Dheerbai smiled at the duo as she walked up to them. " Choti ma, what are all these?" He asked, surprised. " Shagun!" Sajjabai answered excitedly."For Kuwaranisa. She will be blessed with these for the Sagaai. " Sajja Bai smiled at Jaivanta Bai, who nodded. "What Sagaai ?" Kunwar Pratap frowned at his mother. "Your engagement , aree , no one told him?" Sajja giggled a little, amused. " The four of us are choosing separate gifts of our own choice for your bride, Kunwarsa, come and see." Veer Bai urged him.   "The Sagaai is in three days, followed by the wedding on the Seventh, Rajpurohitji had said," Dheerbai informed ...